


Dear Diary,

by RandomPerson11238



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Omega Verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-07-23 23:51:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 47
Words: 38,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20016832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RandomPerson11238/pseuds/RandomPerson11238
Summary: When Clarke, a poor, simple Omega accidentally spills coffee on Alexandria Woods, she finds herself trying to make things up to the Pro-Alpha. What she didn't expect was to become more than the Alpha’s slave… or the making of a version 2 of someone else.





	1. Chapter 1

**Note: the comma in the title is there on purpose.**

**Some of you probably read my previous stories. I put a note in my most recent one saying I would be writing this story for a friend. By the time you guys read this, the story might be finished or it might not be. I just want to put out a warning that their might be abuse, either sexual or physical, a lot of over 18 stuff. Who knows what this story will have. Now onto the characters! 😄**

Clarke Rose Griffin:

Second Gender: Omega

Age: 21

Birthday: September 10th, 3010

Hair Color: Blonde (golden when the sun shines on it)

Eye Color: Blue

Clarke Griffin is a 21 year old who works at a restaurant, when she’s not at training college. She often hangs out alone and draws. Sometimes she’ll be with her Pomeranian, Snow White. Clarke hasn’t lost her virginity even though most Omegas do when they turn 18. She has one more year of the training college before she graduates. 

Raven Reyes:

Second Gender: Beta

Age: 22

Birthday: January 5th, 3010

Hair Color: Dark Brown

Eye Color: Brown

Raven Reyes is 22 year old who didn’t go to training college, she had a ‘master’ or owner before she turned 18. Raven, like many others, lives with her owner. Unlike others, she has a crush on her owner, though her owner doesn’t know. Raven’s owner happens to be Luna Jones, Pro-Alpha’s closest friend. Due to this Raven knows Pro-Alpha but not on a personal level. In fact, Raven hates Pro-Alpha.

(The next person is Octavia, I’m not sure if there’ll be a lot of her but might as well add her)

Octavia Blake:

Second Gender: Omega

Age: 22

Birthday: February 18th, 3009

Hair Color: Dark Brown

Eye Color: Brown

Octavia Blake is a rare case. She’s dating her previous owner who is also the one that set her free as a slave. She doesn’t like her family but she stays in contact with Bellamy. Her parents are dead to her.

Luna May Jones:

Second Gender: Alpha

Age: 24

Birthday: April 5th, 3007

Hair Color: Royal Blue (light brown originally)

Eye Color: Dark Purple

Luna Jones is an Alpha from a rich family. She lives near the Pro-Alpha and visits regularly. Unlike others, Luna doesn’t hurt slaves. Many people want to be her slave due to this reason. Luna has only had one slave, Raven. 

Alexandria Charmante Woods:

Second Gender: Alpha

Age: 23

Birthday: May 21st, 3008

Hair Color: Light Brown

Eye Color: Green

Alexandria Woods is the Pro-Alpha. Many fear her in some way. Although Lexa rules the world and is in charge, she has no interest in ruling it. She also has no interest in a slave or leaving her house (more like a mansion). The only time Lexa will leave the mansion is when she has to. Lexa has many personal maids that clean but every now and then she will use them for when her… rut hits. She does treat Omegas in a mean, unfair way but that’s the way she taught to treat them and that’s the way she thinks is right. 

PS: Alexandria owns a company that is very successful. Even though she has an office in the building, she normally works from home.

**Ok so, now that I have the characters I might as well explain some things:**

  * I have no idea if Luna is actually older than Lexa in the tv series but she is in this story so… yeah
  * Training College, this was mentioned when describing Clarke. I kinda made this up. A training college is like a normal college. You earn a degree and learn what you’re interested in, but this college helps train Omegas and Betas to be future slaves or maids.
  * Slaves, now there’s a difference between slaves and maids, obviously. Slaves are Betas or Omegas that were bought by an Alpha. It’s rare for an Omega or Beta not to be bought or sold to an Alpha. Most Bs (Betas) or Os (Omegas) are sold out by their family but if they’re not, someone gives them money to be their slave. Most slaves are treated bad, really bad. Beaten or whatever. Some rarely have a good home. Some slaves were bought with money to babysit while others were bought so their owners could make money by selling them out.
  * Maids, maids are pretty self explanatory. A person that cleans to make money. Not a slave but just someone who cleans.
  * Rut… we’ll just say this is when an Alpha hits a point every now and then where they need to have sex. Pheromones become stronger and they can’t stand the smell because it turns them on too much. The rut lasts a week but most Alphas only make it 3 days in without sex before they have to have sex. Ruts make them have mood swings and act strange.
  * Pheromones, we’ll put this in an easy way. Pheromones is a smell that Alphas and Omegas carry no matter what, they always have a smell of pheromones. Alphas tend to use them to seduce Omegas and get them to submit. Omegas don’t like pheromones because it attracts Alphas. 
  * Alphas… Alphas are the dominant breed. They tend to take control of things and are leaders. They're also known to have a powerful wolf inside. Alphas are known to use their pheromones for their benefit or for dominance.
  * Omega, Omegas aren't the lowest gender but they're down there with Betas. In fact, Betas normally lead Omegas around. Unlike Betas, Omegas can release pheromones, though they don't like it.
  * Betas, Betas can't release pheromones, they can still transform into a wolf just like the other genders.
  * Genders, there are two genders. Your first gender, male or female, second gender, Alpha, Omega, Beta.
  * Why do Omegas lose their virginity before they turn 18? Most Omegas and Betas know they're destined to get raped or their owner will take their virginity so, when the Beta or Omega turns 18, they'll have sex with their crush. That way they were able to give away one of their most precious things to a loved one.



I don’t know what else to mention. If something else comes up in the story I might put something like

**(this)**

and then they’re be text explaining what it is or I might put it in the notes at the end.


	2. Prologue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't do chapter summaries... sorry?

_ In the year 3031, we no longer have presidents or ‘leaders’. Not that we voted against it or anything, we didn’t really have a choice when a female Alpha, more powerful than every other Alpha, showed up. She quickly over took the world with her strength, pheromones, money, and beauty. No one really knows who she is… she kinda just showed up out of nowhere. Rumor has it she’s an alien from space or Satan’s daughter. What we do know, is that we don’t want to get on her bad side. ‘Lucky’ ones can be her personal slave or maid. A previous slave told us she does unthinkable things, and everyone is lucky not to be her slave… that slave was later tortured then beheaded on live tv by none other than the Pro-Alpha herself, Alexandria Woods. _

_ Now you’re probably wondering, what does this have to do with you? Well I, a simple Omega, an Omega who used to work for a restaurant, an Omega who is 21 years old and still a virgin, an Omega who just moved out of her mom’s home… is her slave. How’d that happen? Well… that’s a long story. _


	3. Coffee Spill

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone's thoughts

June 5th, 3031

“Clarke, we have a customer at table 5”, Josee lightly taps my shoulder.

“I'll go right now”, I head out of the kitchen. I walk over to table 5 and quickly regret it.

“What's up Blondie?”, Poppy smirks at me. “You look cute as a maid.”

“What do you need?”, I try to keep the annoyance out of my voice.

"I would like croissants and coffee”, Poppy bats her eyes at me.

_ She makes me so fucking mad. _

"Coming right up", I force a smile at Poppy.

When I come out of the kitchen, I have two croissants and a cup of hot coffee. I head straight to Poppy's table. "Here is your croissants", I put the plate down. "And here is your coffee."

"Is that black coffee?"

"Is that not what you ordered?"

"I can't drink black coffee, Griffin", Poppy glares at me.

"Sorry, that's on me", I take the coffee. "I'll be back with the coffee you ordered and wanted."

"Hurry."

I turn around to head back to the kitchen.

_ Hurry! Hurry my ass. You stupid bi- _

"Clarke!"

I bump into someone, the sound of a shattering cup follows. 

"I am so sorry", I look at the person. They have coffee on their white shirt. "I wasn't watching where I was…", I trail off when I see who the person is.

_ Oh shit. _

********

“Here are the papers you wanted”, Anya sets some files on my desk.

I look at the Omega.

_ She looks so innocent. _

A smirk appears on my face.

_ That’s what most think, wait until they see her in bed. Stupid masochist. _

“Leave”, I take a file.

Anya nods and leaves the office.

“What are you up to?”, I eye a photo. The video replays in my head, over and over again. “It has to be you… has to be.”

There’s a knock on the door then Luna walks in.

“What do you want?”

“Leave the house, people think you’re dead.”

“Wouldn’t they want that?”, I close the file.

“Maybe if you were more nice”, Luna walks over to the desk. “They wouldn’t want to hang you.”

“I don’t care how they feel”, I stand up. “I could use a donut.”

Luna laughs but doesn’t say anything.

“What’s so funny?”, I look around Luna. An outline of a female is barely noticeable.

“People see you as a big bad wolf but in reality you have such a sweet tooth.”

“Get out”, I head towards the exit. “Go on, I’m right behind you.”

“I know it’s not my place”, Luna follows me outside. “But what were you looking at?”

I open the driver side of a car. “You’re right”, I get in and close the door. Rolling down the window I say, “it’s not your place.”

“Does it have something to do with the video?”

I look at Luna’s slave. She has her head bowed as she avoids eye contact.

“Get that thing off my property, I’m gonna catch a disease from it.”

Luna looks at her slave. “Raven’s a perfect, healthy Beta. I assure you, you won’t get a disease.”

“Yeah yeah, just get it off my property”, I roll up the window. “Uh, this place better have good donuts”, I get out of the car. I look up at the sign. “Hot Beans Restaurant…”, looking around I see a few cars. “Not that popular”, I walk towards the entrance. “Needs a clean up.”

When I walk into the restaurant, a few people glance at me. Others pretend not to notice. A blonde in a waitress outfit catches my eyes.

_ Maybe I can some help around here. _

“...ordered and wanted”, the blonde turns around. 

“Clarke!”

The blonde bumps right into me. My skin feels on fire as the hot coffee spreads out on my white shirt. I don’t hear what the blonde is saying as anger shoots through me.

“You stupid rat”, I fan out my shirt. “I just bought this”, I look at the blonde.

She looks up at me, her eyes wide.

“Well? Are you gonna help me or not?”

“Right, sorry”, the blonde puts her stuff on a table. “If you’ll follow me I can get you a wet towel. Do you have a change of clothes?”

“No! I don’t want around thinking some hollow headed Omega is gonna spill coffee on me.”

The blonde nods and starts walking. “Back here are some extra shirts.”

I walk into a back room.

“We have a…”

I take off my shirt.

“Or you can change here, that’s happening.”

Ignoring the blonde, I put on a white restaurant shirt. 

“Is there any other way I can assist you?”

“Just get me a donut so I can leave here as soon as possible”, I glare at the Omega.

“Coming right up, feel free to sit at a table.”

I wait by the exit of the restaurant. A few minutes pass before the blonde comes out of the kitchen. She has a maple long john. I take the donut and make a move to leave. 

“Actually”, I smile at the woman. I drop the donut in the trash. “A donut isn’t gonna make it up.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re gonna come with me to buy a new shirt.”

“What?!”


	4. Shopping

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

********

“Y-you want me to go shopping with you?”, I look at the Pro-Alpha.

“Is that not what I just said?”, she leaves the building.

I open the door. “I can’t leave my shift.”

“It’ll be fine”, she keeps walking. “Now come on, be a good Omega and follow.”

_ I’m not a dog. _

Despite the thought I find myself following her. I can hear someone yelling my name.

_ I’m sorry. _

I follow the Alpha all the way to a mall. Tiny bots fly around, picking up trash. Someone shouts from the top of the roof.

“Watch out!”

A can of paint falls at my feet. It doesn’t splatter on me.

“Ugh, seriously Octavia”, a bald man picks up the can. “Sorry about that.”

Pro-Alpha glares at the man. I can see disgust in her eyes.

_ Does she despise everyone? _

“It’s ok.”

The man nods and climbs up a ladder.

Walking behind the Alpha, I follow her inside. She heads straight to the shirts. I watch as she browses through things.

“Hold this”, she tosses a shirt at me. 

Without thinking I catch the shirt with my arm. It lays across my arm.

“Don’t wrinkle it”, the Alpha keeps browsing.

_ Why am I doing this? _

********

“Actually”, I smile at the woman. I drop the donut in the trash. “A donut isn’t gonna make it up.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re gonna come with me to buy a new shirt.”

“What?!”

“Y-you want me to go shopping with you?”, the blonde gapes at me.

“Is that not what I just said?”, I leave the building.

_ This blonde would make a great personal maid, she’s already a waitress and seems to have manners. Work on her stupidity and strong pheromones then we’ll be good. Now let’s see if she follows. _

“I can’t leave my shift.”

“It’ll be fine”, I speed up. “Now come on, be a good Omega and follow.”

Through the corner of my eye I see her hesitate but she follows anyways.

_ She’s good at following orders too. _

She follows me to the mall without saying anything. I notice curiosity spark in her eyes when she sees the robots.

“Watch out!”

Paint lands in front of the blonde. I glance at the paint can.

_ That could’ve easily hit the blonde. _

I shrug at the thought.

_ Not my problem. _

“Ugh, seriously Octavia”, a man picks up the can. “Sorry about that.”

I decide not to say anything. I do eye his outfit though.

_ So dirty. How is this man an Alpha? _

“It’s ok”, the blonde looks at the man.

Once the man is up the ladder, I decide to go inside. I quickly go to the shirt section to start browsing. The Omega silently stands.

_ She’s really like a slave. Hmm… interesting. _

“Hold this”, I toss a shirt at her, watching as she easily catches it. She even smooths it out when I say not to wrinkle it.

When I have an ok amount of shirts, I head to the dressing room. I leave the door open waiting for the blonde. She doesn’t seem to get it though. “Come in.”

“Aren’t you changing”, she steps into the stall.

I close the door behind her. “Yes, I am”, I hold out my hand. “Shirt.”

The blonde hands me a shirt. I put it on and see how I look. “Nah.”

About 45 minutes later I purchase a shirt.

“We done?”, the blonde walks a few feet behind me. “I might’ve been fired.”

“If you were”, I look at the blonde. “Would you want to work for me?”

The blonde doesn’t say anything.

“Just kidding”, I start walking again. I get a taxi. “See ya”, the taxi drives away from the blonde, leaving her on the sidewalk.

********   
“Wow, ok”, I start walking.

_ Now I can see why everyone hates the Pro-Alpha. She’s a bitch. _

My phone dings. I look at the message.

Poppy: Hey loser, the manager told me to tell you that you’ve been fired. Feel free to come in tomorrow and pick up your check.

_ Can this day get any worse? _

Something wet drops on my head. I look up. When I do it starts pouring. My clothes quickly become soaking wet and heavy.

_ Guess it can. _

June 12th, 3031

“And here we ha…” Mrs. LandCow trails off as the door opens.

The principal walks in, two women behind him. “Mind if I interrupt?”

“No, not at all”, the teacher sits at her desk.

“We have a guest”, the principal moves.

My jaw drops when Pro-Alpha appears.

_ What the hell? _

I sink in my seat hoping she won’t notice me. Instead that does the exact opposite, her eyes land directly on me. A smirk on her stupid face.

“If you guys would be so kind to welcome Mrs. Woods and Mrs. Jones.”

_ Woods? Jones? _

Pro-Alpha steps forward. “Most of you guys know me, whether it be for a good reason or not”, the Alpha looks away from me. She eyes the whole class. “I’m not here to shut down your precious…”, she runs a finger along the desk. She looks at her finger and wipes it off on the principal. “School.”

“Then why are you here?”, Poppy looks at the Alpha.

“The person knows why I’m here or she has an idea”, the Alpha looks at me. Her phone goes off. I watch as she whispers something to the woman with blue hair then leaves.

“I’ll be taking over”, blue hair steps forward. “Like Mrs. Woods said, the person knows why we’re here.”

I sink further. Everyone’s eyes are on me now.

“Mrs. Griffin, would you come to the front?”, the Principal looks at me.

“Uh… sure”, I stand up and head to the front.

“Clarke here will no longer be attending this school.”

My eyes widen. “What?”

Mrs. Jones pulls out a lot of money. “Mrs. Woods”, she hands the money to the principal. “is buying you”


	5. Run Forest, Run

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

********

I feel sadness run through me when I see the blonde’s face drop. It’s like her world was just crushed. When I look at the rest of the class they all seem sad too.

_ Was the blonde popular? _

I notice a pink haired Beta looking crushed the most. I think she’s about to cry.

“Shall we go?”, I look at the blonde. 

She doesn’t respond. I do notice her hands are shaking. When I look at her face I see that’s she’s holding back tears. 

Smiling I wrap my arm around her shoulders.

_ Might as well try to calm her down. _

I open the passenger side of the front seat. The blonde doesn’t move, she stares at the front seat.

“Let’s get something straight.”

The blonde looks up at me.

“Mrs. Woods can’t handle people moping and acting like the world is against them so you gotta change your attitude or you two are not gonna get along”, I wait for the blonde to say something but she doesn’t. “Fine”, I pinch the bridge of my nose. “If you’re not gonna talk then at least tell me your name.”

The blonde still doesn’t respond. Instead she takes a tiny step back, her eyes on the ground.

“Hey, I can make you walk until you find my house, trust me, it’s far. So you can either tell me your name or walk. Your choice”, I really don’t wanna but mean but, “Three”, I start closing the door. “Two”, the door closes. “On-”

“Clarke.”

“Clarke?”

“Clarke Griffin”, she grabs onto her shirt.

“And you’re an Omega?”

She nods.

I glare at her.

“Y-yes, I am.”

“Knew it, when we get to the house first thing you are gonna do is shower. Your pheromones are strong”, I open the door and walk around the car. Once I’m in I notice the blonde still standing outside. “Well, get in.”

The blonde steps back. Before I know it, she’s gone.

“Shit”, I get out of the car. “She’s running”, I speak into the tiny mic on my shirt.

“What do you mean she’s running?”, Lexa’s angry voice sounds in my ears.

“I mean she’s running!”, I run after the blonde. 

“Well get her!”

The blonde pushes past people. 

_ She’s fast. _

I watch as she turns into a wolf.

_ What the hell? I can’t even do that. _

“She’s a wolf!”

“She can transform?!”

“Apparently!”, I quickly run down an alley. “I think I can get her to come in your direction then it’s up to you.”

“Just do what you can.”

********

I can feel the blood rushing through me, my paws sound louder than they actually are. I have to stop when I see Mrs. Jones. I quickly turn around and run into an alleyway. When I do a black wolf pops out of nowhere. It runs on the roof of buildings, its green eyes showing anger.

_ What the actual fuck! _

With a growl the wolf jumps in front of me. I skid to a stop. The wolf doesn’t blink as it stares me down, slowly getting closer. I glance over my shoulder.

_ Turn and run? _

**_Now, little did I know that running wasn’t gonna help. It actually made things worse… way worse._ **

I turn around. Something heavy forces me to the ground. I feel teeth sink into my neck as I wrestle to get away. A wave of strong pheromones hits my nose.

_ No. _

I feel myself shaking as the pheromones get stronger. Succumbing to the pheromones, I turn back to a human. An arm slips around my waist, another around my chest. I claw at the ground trying to get away.

“You’re not making this easy.”

_ That voice. _

Feeling fear overcome me, I look over my shoulder. Mrs. Woods doesn’t glare at me but she doesn’t look happy. A sob escapes my mouth as the tears start falling. Shock seems to overcome Mrs. Woods. I turn around in her arms and grab onto her shirt, my face burrowing into her neck.

********   
I lay low on a roof waiting. I can smell the blonde in the distance. I close my eyes and focus on her scent. When I open my eyes a golden pelted wolf runs into the alley. I leap up and start running. I keep an eye on the blonde but also an eye ahead of her. 

_ Now! _

I turn and leap down, landing in front of her. She stops running and seems to panic. I don’t make a move until she turns to run. I leap at her, bringing both of us to the ground. I fight with her making sure not to harm her. When I finally get a grip on her neck, I know I’ve won. I forcefully push out dominant pheromones. The more I push out my pheromones, the faster the blonde stops struggling. When she turns into a human, I do too. I get a hold of her but she starts wrestling to get away.

“You’re not making this easy”, I whisper the words.

The blonde freezes and looks at me. Next I know she’s crying, her face hidden in my neck.

_ Ugh, I can feel her tears on my neck. _

I visibly cringe. “Luna”, I whisper into the mic. “I got her.”


	6. Becoming a Slave

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

June 14th, 3031

********

Opening my eyes, a painful headache hits me. “Gah”, I grab onto my head. I shake the feeling away and look around. 

_ Where am I? _

I stand up, the sound of chains following. I look down to see a chain around my ankle.

_ What the hell?! _

I crouch down and fiddle with the chain.

“You’re awake”, a woman with her head mostly shaved walks over to me. “How do you feel?”

“Where am I?”

“I can’t say, how do you feel?”

“I have a headache… my vision is a little blurry.”

“Understandable”, the woman nods. “Mistress had us put you under a drug that would have you sleeping.”

“Why?”

“You hurt your paw when you were running, she knew you would be frantic and wouldn’t sit still”, the woman puts a wet towel on my forehead. “Your paw has healed so… we decided to wake you up.”

“How can you tell it healed?”

“Just can”, the woman stands up. “I will inform the Mistress of you’re waking. She should be here shortly.”

“I don’t wanna see that bitch”, I glare at the woman.

She only shakes her head then leaves the room.

A few minutes pass before Pro-Alpha walks into the room. “I didn’t expect you to run”, she leans against a wall. 

I look at her. She seems rather calm. I notice her attire isn’t what you see her wearing on tv. She’s wearing ripped black jeans, a leather jacket and white tank top. Her hair is braided in a neat pattern. I crawl forward, squinting my eyes at her forehead.

_ What’s that on her head? _

“It’s not polite to stare”, Alpha steps closer to me. She crouches down and roughly grabs my chin. “Interesting…”, she moves my head side to side. “No wonder you were such a good runner”, she lets me go. “It’s rare for someone’s wolf pelt to be the same color as their hair.”

“Wh-why’d you buy me?”

Alpha stands up, a smirk on her face. “Do I need a reason?”

“A maid?”

“Maybe…”, Alpha walks around me. She checks the chain. “But do you think I would treat a maid like this?”

“I… I ran from you.”

“Are you a virgin”, Alpha looks at me.

_ Wow, change of subject. _

“E-excuse me?”

“Are you a virgin?”, she seems calm asking this question. “Well?”

“Y-yes”, I nod.

“Hmm… then you shall be my Omega slave.”

“No!”, I scoot closer. “I can’t be a slave, I don’t know how, I wouldn’t be a good slave! I… I can’t have sex, do… suck on the dick thing, or anything related to that.”

Alpha eyes me. “Hmm… I’ll have to teach you.”

I feel my face heat up.

Alpha laughs and stands up. “Don’t worry, I’m not gonna rape you.”

“I-isn’t that what you do?”, I look up at her.

“What?”

“People at school always said you would rape Omegas to the point they break and become mindless. Then you kill them and eat them.”

Alpha shakes her head. “I don’t do that, the people I have sex with are willing people”, she heads towards the exit. “I mean sure, I don’t treat my maids very well but I’ve never had a slave before. You would be the first.”

“Why me then? Can’t I be a maid?”

Alpha looks at me. “Nope”, she shakes her head.

“Why though?”

“You are to be my slave, this way I don’t have to find a willing person.”

“So you _are_ going to rape me.”

“That depends on your willingness”, she leaves the room.

I turn away and go back to a corner. I sit in the corner, hugging my knees. I wipe my eyes trying not to cry but none of that works. Tears start rolling down my face. “God, I wanna go home”, I whisper the words.

_ If I was at home I wouldn’t be becoming a slave. _

********

“Well?”, I look at Lexa when she walks into the living room. “How’d it go?”

“She’s convinced I’m gonna rape her.”

“Did you tell her that you were gonna rape her?!”

“Of course not”, Lexa sits down, taking off her jacket. “You know the rumors, I rape Omegas then eat them. She convinced that I was gonna do that to her.”

“And did you say you weren’t?”, I lean forward in my seat.

Lexa nods. “I said I wouldn’t hurt her.”

“Liar.”

She looks at Raven. “Ok, then what did I say?”

“I don’t know, but you didn’t say that.”

Leaning back Lexa smiles at her. “So you’re going on empty evidence?”

“Hmph”, Raven looks down.

She calmly smooths down her hair before pulling out her phone. I watch as she seems to read a few messages.

“We? What the hell…”, Lexa types something. “God dammit Jasmine”, she tosses her phone on the coffee table.

“What’d she do now?”

“Turns out the family is coming in two days.”

“That’s never bugged you before.”

_ At least I don’t think it has. _

“I’m pissed because I have a slave! One that isn’t trained so that’s destined to make something bad happen.”

“You’ll find a way to figure something out”, I smile to reassure her. “Train her after. All you need her to do is be busy with something.”

“But how do I ensure she actually obeys?”

I shrug. 

Lexa smiles. “I have an idea”, something shining in her eyes as she says that.

_ This can’t be good. _


	7. Training?

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

********

June 15th, 3031

I feel myself tense up when the metal door opens. I try to control my shaking as I look at the person by the door.

_ Pro-Alpha. _

“Did you sleep at all?”, she eyes me.

I decide not to answer as I hug my knees tighter. I watch as Pro-Alpha walks over to the chain.

She pulls out a key unlocking it from the wall. “I’m gonna take you out of this room. Let you meet some people then we’ll start your training.”

_ Training? _

“Well stand up”, Alpha glares at me.

I stand up, my legs shaking. The Alpha leads me out of the room. The sunlight shines through a window hitting me in the face. I bring my hands to my eyes and cover them with a whimper.

“In here we have everyone that you’ll see around the house.”

I uncover my eyes.

“First we have my maids”, Alpha motions to women in a black and white maid outfit.

A girl with long hair that almost reaches her feet, steps forward. 

I instinctively step back, weird thing is I step closer to the Alpha. The Alpha eyes me but doesn’t say anything. 

“Long hair is Julie”, Alpha speaks for the maid. “You’ll find her cooking in the kitchen with Anya.”

“A-Anya?”, I glance at the Alpha.

“Anya is the one with tattoos all over her, though she looks like trouble, she prefers to cook and make dessert.”

Anya nods at me. I nervously smile at her. When I look at the Alpha, she's looking at me. I can’t tell what she’s thinking.

She looks away. “The bald one with a rose tattooed on her head is Mackenzie, she works outside. Gardening and all that.”

Mackenzie waves at me. 

“She works with Brindle.”

A woman with short hair, that she prevents from getting in her eyes with hair clips, waves at me.

“Then we have-”

“I’m Aya!”, a girl with a headband basically bounces forward. “Can’t wait to work with you, though we might not work together. I clean the house with Michelle. She’s a nerd and may act cold towards you but don’t be fooled. She’s a big softie… like a teddy bear. Anyways, if you do get to work in the house I’ll gladly show you around. In fact I’ll show you around even if you end up outside or in the kitchen. I-”

“That’s enough Aya”, Michelle glares at her coworker. “Sorry about her”, she looks at me. “She’s energetic.”

I nod. I scan over the maids again. I notice the way Julie looks at Alpha.

_ Does she like Alpha? _

Mackenzie’s fingers twitch every now and then.

_ She’s desperate to do something. Must be the type that likes to have hands on experience. _

Brindle stands still, her head bowed but I can see her looking at Anya.

_ So she likes Anya? _

Anya absently stares at a guard.

_ Who is that guard? _

Aya bounces on her toes as she looks at me. It’s a weird look… like she’s undressing me.

Michelle glances at Aya then at me. I see anger in her eyes, like I did something. I look at Alpha. “Guards?”, I whisper the words.

“My guards are Michael, Elliot, Jeromy, Nacho, and Oscar.”

I nod.

“Master, will she be working around the house?”, Aya bounces up and down.

“Before that, what’s your name?”, Brindle looks at me.

“Clarke.”

“Anyways, Clarke isn’t a maid. She’s my personal slave.”

I see Julie’s face drop.

_ I’ll have to ask later. _

“Will she be handling your… ruts?”

_ Who asks that? _

“Probably not, she hasn’t even lost her virginity.”

I see Julie’s face light up.

_ Did Julie handle the ruts? Maybe that’s why she likes the Alpha… free sex. _

“For now I think… I’ll have Clarke outside.”, Alpha looks at me. “You’ll be gardening for today.”

I don’t respond.

“Is that ok?”

I nod. “I… I guess.”

“Good”, she looks away. “Mackenize, Brindle, please show her what to do. Julie come with me.”

I follow Mackenzie and Brindle outside. When I walk past the Alpha, I feel her lightly touch my side. I look over my shoulder and at her but she’s not looking at me.

“Don’t mind her, she probably put a tracker or something”, Brindle lightly nudges me. “I’ll show you what to do.”

********

“What are you planning on doing with Clarke?”, Julie looks up at me. 

I look at the maid. She lies on the bed, sweat slowly running down her face.

“I don’t know”, I look at my door. “What would you suggest?”

“Leaving her outside as a gardener.”

I smile and look at Julie. “You’re worried I’m gonna have her take your place.”

“What? No!”

“I see the way you look at me Julie”, I grab the maids chin forcing her to look at me. I lean forward, a chuckle escape as I watch Julie close her eyes. “You’re nothing but a maid to me”, I let her go. “Remember that.”

Julie opens her eyes. I can see her holding back tears but she nods. “Yes Master.”

The door swings open, Mackenzie politely bows saying “master” as she does.

“What is it?”

“Clarke… we can’t find her.”

_ I knew this would happen. _

********

“Oh, this is pretty”, I pick a flower. I only freeze when a smell sweeps over my nose. I follow the scent to a field of roses. All of them a ray of colors.

_ Wow. _

I walk into the field. “Whose field is this?”

********

“Do you want me to come with you?”, Julie sits up in the bed.

“No”, I leave the room fully clothed. 

“Leaving?”, Luna looks at me.

“The stupid blonde can’t be found. I’m going to hunt her down based on scent.”

“Don’t get lost.”

“I won’t”, I turn into a wolf and slip out of the doggy door. Once outside I sniff the air. 

_ Where’d you go? I wonder if you’re running… _

I smile and start walking. Every now and then I’ll stop and make sure I’m still following her scent. She smells like blooming cherry blossoms. It’s sweet… reminds me of her.

A redhead flashes before my eyes. She’s smiling at me.

_ Stop it! She’s gone… _

I stop walking when I hear a giggle. A very familiar giggle. One that seems to warm my heart. I find myself running. Running with empty hope. In hope that it’s her, not the blonde but… Costia.


	8. Flowers

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

My paws come to a stop when I see a flower field. The colors seem to explode on my face. Blind my eyes. Even though they seem blinding and too colorful I find myself searching the flower field. A person in the distance chases a butterfly. A giggle coming from them, a smile on their face. 

**(Flashback)**

**I walk into a flower field, the pollen running up my snout causing me to sneeze every few minutes. Someone giggles from behind me. A crimson colored wolf runs by me, its tongue out. The wolf disappears into the flowers. It suddenly leaps up at a butterfly, its mouth open. Once gravity takes it toll, she turns into a human. Her red hair seeming like a flower itself. My heart beats faster as a giggle comes from her. She lands with her back to me, still giggling about something.**

**(End of flashback)**

I find myself watching the figure, I know it’s not Costia but… why do I have such hope? The light shines on the figure revealing Clarke. She’s smiling as butterflies fly around her. She looks up in awe. 

********

I look at the roses. “I better get back”, I gently touch a rose. Sighing I look at the outline of the trees, freezing when I see a familiar wolf.

_ Alpha… _

The wolf stands up and walks over to me. It sniffs me before turning into a human. I look up at Alpha. She doesn’t say anything.

_ Is she ok? _

I watch as her face squeezes and she makes weird faces. A cute kitten like noise comes from her.

_ Was that a sneeze? _

“What are you doing out here?”, she quickly says something.

“I… I don’t know”, I look down. I hear a growl come from her.

“Look at me”, she growls at me.

I look at her. When I do the colors of the roses seem to drain. The happiness, freeness I felt disappears as I remember what I am. Who I am.

“You can’t just walk away, walk off”, Lexa steps forward.

I struggle to keep her gaze.

“Clarke!”, Lexa screams in my face.

_ Was she talking? _

“Am I understood?”

I nod. 

Everything happens quickly. My face now stings. My eyes screwed close as the tears threaten to fall.

“Answer me!”

“Y-yes… I understand.”

“Yes what?”

_ What do I call her? Others called her master but I’m not a maid. Other slaves call their owners all sorts of things. Daddy, Papa, Owner, Master, The one, etc. _

“Alpha?”, I tilt my head.

Alpha eyes me before sighing. “Let’s get back to the house”, she pinches the bridge of her nose.

It’s a silent walk, one I wish wasn’t happening. My head hangs as we walk, no interest left inside me.

_ I would’ve loved exploring this forest… it’s so mysterious. _

“We’re here.”

I look at the front door of the house. Looking around I see a path that leads to the door. This place has a big gate at the front.

_ Does it go around the forest? _

I do notice people walking on the sidewalks. 

_ Maybe there’s a town in a forest? _

Shaking my head I walk into the house.

“There you are!” Mackenzie runs over to me. She seems to scan for cuts or anything. Her eyes spot the red on my cheek. “C’mon”, she glances at Alpha. “Let’s get you to work.”

“Actually”, Alpha steps forward. “I don’t think Clarke can do good outside, I-”

“Inside!”, Aya runs down the stairs. She bounces up and down by the Alpha. “She can work with me!”, she runs in a circle around me.

“Aya! Knock it off!”, Michelle looks over the balcony. “Sorry Master.”

Alpha shrugs. “Maybe tomorrow”, she glances at me.

Her glance causes me to look at the ground, my hands now playing with my shirt. 

“For now Clarke can help make dinner.”

I nod not bothering to look at the Alpha. She doesn’t seem to care due to the fact she walks away.

“We’re going to have Teriyaki Chicken”, Anya leads me to the kitchen.

I have to put an apron on as I help them cook. When it’s done it looks rather good. The smells sweep into the air making my stomach growl.

“When was the last time you ate?”

I shrug. “I… I don’t think I ate this morning.”

“This food that we made is for us. We normally get oatmeal or something but today we got pizza.”

“Your choice?”

“No, Master tosses a food or thinks of something.”

_ Don’t get to eat the food you make… harsh. _

Later I head back to my dungeon like room. I learned that the maids share a room, it has 3 bunk beds and a queens. My room doesn’t even have a bed. 

June 16th, 3031

“C’mon Blondie”, Julie opens the door. “Breakfast is in the making.”

It takes a few minutes for me to hype myself up to leave the room. When I walk into the living room, Alpha stands up.

“I got you something.”

I hear a glass break. Julie and Anya both look into the living from the kitchen. All the maids seem shocked. The woman with a high ponytail does too. I am yet to learn her name. 

“I never got anything. I deepthroat that woman for heaven’s sake”, I happen to hear Julie whisper those words to Anya.

Anya looks at the woman with disgust but doesn’t say anything.

Alpha pulls out a collar.

I eye it before looking at her.    
“Go on”, she lightly shakes it to emphasize her point.

“Uh…”, I grab the collar. I look it over before looking at her again.

“Put it on”, I can see she’s getting impatient.

“S-sorry”, I quickly put it on.

“Good”, Alpha pulls out a remote. She takes my hand and puts it on the palm of my hand. She lets me go but doesn’t say anything.

I eye the remote. There’s a knob that goes up and down. It clicks as it moves, it goes from green to yellow then red.

“I had someone install that on a wall. Now, you’re gonna work outside with Mackenzie and Brindle.”

When I head outside I meet Brindle outside. “We’re gonna pick some things. You’re going to pick the strawberries.”

I head over to the strawberry section. I start picking, sneaking one every now and then. Something seems to shock my throat when I move. I gag, coughing up bits of strawberry. I decide to shake the feeling away and continue on my way. The feeling comes again but harder. I yelp in pain, falling backwards onto my butt. I claw at the collar hoping to get it off. The shocks come in waves, over and over. At this point I whimper as I claw. A tidal wave seems to wash over me. I scream at the pain, helplessly rolling as my throat gets stabbed at repeatedly. When the pain is gone it takes me a few seconds to realize I kicked up grass. My claws digging into the dirt, jaw hanging loosely as my tongue lolls out. I stand up shaking my pelt off. I mentally draw a line of a barrier.

********

“So your plan was to… shock the girl?”, Luna looks at me.

“Should keep her where I can see her”, I lean back with a smile. “And it was interesting.”

“You’re such a sadist”, Luna shakes her head.


	9. New Friend

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

June 20th, 3031

**“I apologize for &*(^.”**

**The name sounds like a scratchy tv, one that buzzes in my ears. It rings for a while before disappearing into background noise. “For who?”**

**“Can’t say.”**

**I look at the person. A red head stands a few feet away. She looks rather sad. “Who are you?”**

**“Can’t say.”**

**“Why are you here?”**

**She looks at me. “To watch the outcome.”**

Light floods my vision. Looking around I see I’m still in my room. Nothing’s changed. The collar stabs into my throat causing me to groan. When I leave my room I head to a window. The light shines through, it shines on the grass. Morning dew glistening on the little blades. I’m about to head outside when I remember the collar. I now fear walking outside. I don’t know when the shock will come.

“I can help you”, ponytail walks over to me.

“How?”

“Set a border. I know where the line is, where you’ll get shocked.”

“Why would you help me?”

“It isn’t easy living here. Lexa is a… she’s cruel.”

“Lexa?”

“Alpha, the one that had you put on a collar. The one that’s been treating you like shit.”

“Oh…”

“I’m Raven by the way”, she holds out her hand.

“Clarke”, I shake her hand.

We both head outside. Raven walks me along the border, she talks as she does.

“Lexa is a sadist”, she glances at me. “So she enjoys inflicting pain on people. It turns her on, so everytime you react… you’re giving her satisfaction. Pleasure”, Raven eyes where we are before continuing. “It seems that she likes to torture you, hence the shock collar. Now what you don’t know is that if you don’t react, laugh it off, or simply don’t say anything then that’ll frustrate her. She wants you in pain but if you don’t show any then you win.”

“Why pain?”

“She was abused as a child, she was always hit so I guess she’s letting others feel her pain, I overheard her and Luna talking. Apparently you are to become Lexa’s personal… sex slave.”

“I can’t do that!”, my eyes widen. 

“You might have to, we all do things we dislike.”

“Whose slave are you?”

“I’m not a slave. I’m actually more like a friend to my master...”

Eyeing Raven I can see a slight blush.

_ Is she embarrassed to admit it? Maybe there’s another reason. _

“I got lucky”, Raven smiles at me. Her blush has disappeared by now.

“That’s nice”, I smile at her. “So… how did you get into Luna’s custody?”

“She bought me when I was 18, I don’t know why but she just did. Even at the beginning.”

I learn many things as Raven and I talk. By the end of the day I realized a few things. She blushes when Luna comes up in the conversation, likes the outside but hates the forest that surrounds this house, and doesn’t like Pro-Alpha.

A cold breeze makes me shiver. I turn into a wolf and sniff around the empty room. It doesn’t take long for me to find a spot that the wind doesn’t hit with its cold breeze. A few minutes pass, and I find I can’t sleep. Nothing works, my eyes keep opening beyond my will. 

“What has me up?”, I push my muzzle under my arm. “Maybe Raven? Does she like Luna?”

“You shouldn’t speak out loud.”


	10. Pro-Alpha

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

********

“You didn’t have the blonde do anything today”, Luna glances up from brushing Raven’s hair. 

“I was gonna show her around but Raven did that for me so I had nothing for her to do”, I shrug.

“There’s a lot more to show her then the property in sight”, Luna stops brushing. “You’re good.”

“Thanks”, Raven stands up.

I do notice the blush on her face.

_ Does Luna know the girl likes her? _

“Head to the bedroom, don’t wait for me”, Luna smiles at her slave. Once Raven is gone, her smile disappears.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do with Clarke tomorrow.”

“Aya wants her to work with her… you could do that. Keep her busy and not bouncing around the house.”

“I guess she can do that, I still need to get more groceries… I’ll send Julie and Anya.”

“Ok, well I’m gonna go to bed, got an Omega waiting”, Luna winks at me.

“Don’t be too rough.”

Once Luna is gone, I can hear the click of claws. It comes from the direction of the blonde’s room.

_ Is she walking in wolf form? _

Not having anything to do, I head in that direction.

“Does she like Luna?”

_ Is she talking to herself? _

I open the door, “you shouldn’t speak out loud”, I lean against the door.

A golden wolf looks at me. Awe runs through me as I finally get a look at her wolf. It’s a color I haven’t seen before, a beautiful color. 

_ Here I thought Costia’s was cool. _

Her wolf has gorgeous blue eyes, sadly they don’t compare to Clarke’s original blue, they seem more dull. Her pelt is a wonderful gold color that lightens near the tip of her ears and paws. One ear tip has a thin white streak. I notice a paw that’s mostly hidden under her fur has two white knuckles… just like Costia. Clarke’s nose though is a pink, not black or brown but pink. It also has a black spot on her nose that looks like a heart. 

When I look at the eyes, they seem rather scared. Kinda like they’ve been busted.

“Don't look so scared”, I smile at her. “Anyways, I just heard noise so I came to see what it was.”

_ Lies, fucking Luna has me thinking about things. _

********

I stand up, my claws clinking as they do. 

_ Did she just come to see what the noise was? That’s a waste of time. _

I walk over to her, curiosity taking over me. I sniff her leg before turning away.

Alpha groan. I turn and look at her. She mumbles something and seems to having a fight with herself. “Ugh, fine”, Alpha looks at me. “Do… do you want to go to my room?”

Turning back to a human I stare at her. “Why?”

“I have to get you bed, I figured you would want to sleep somewhere with a bed.”

I look around my room before nodding. “Fine.”

********

I look at the blonde with surprise. I only offered cause Luna gave me the advice.

Earlier that day:

“That girl hasn’t been here long and you’ve scared the shit out of her”, Luna glares at me. 

“It’s life”, I shrug and take a sip of water.

“Don’t you think you should make her like you? Want to be your slave?”

“Nah… I don’t need that.”

Luna doesn’t respond. Instead she turns on the tv. 

_ Make her like me… what does that do for me? _

The blonde pops into my mind. She makes me think of the flower field, she was so happy. Carefree. The flower field slowly turns red as a gunshot goes off, sending the blonde to the floor.

“Lexa! What are you doing?”, Luna grabs my hand. “You just crushed that glass like it was nothing.”

“I’m fine”, I rip my hand away. “God… why does she remind me of her?”

Luna looks up at me. “What?”

“Clarke!”, I snap at Luna. “She reminds me so much of Costia.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“I don’t know.”

“Or don’t want to face the truth”, Luna looks at the tv.

Present moment:

“C’mon then, we don’t have all night”, I leave the room. I hear Clarke following me all the way up the stairs. I open my room door and she walks in. She scans the room, taking in every detail. “You can sleep on the bed with me, or if it makes you comfortable, I can sleep on the couch in this room.”

“I-it’s fine”, Clarke crawls onto the bed. She sits on a side of the bed, her eyes still on me.

“That’s my side.”

“Oh, sorry”, Clarke makes a move to go to the other side. 

“No!” I quickly stop her. “It’s… it’s fine”, I get on the other side. I lay down, “I hope you don’t snore”, I flash a smile at her before turning off the lamp. The smile stays on my face the whole night.

**(Flashback)**

**“That’s my side”, I look at Costia.**

**“Too bad”, she smiles at me.**

**“You little burger”, I crawl onto the bed.**

**“I love you too.”**

**I lay down facing her. “You’ve been saying that a lot more… is something wrong?”**

**“If I ever leave, don’t shut down”, Costia rolls over.**

**“Don’t worry about that, you’re never leaving”, I smile at her.**

**“Promise me”, Costia’s smile drops. “Promise you’ll move on and find someone new.”**

**I don’t respond. The thought of losing her breaks my heart.**

**“Lexa.”**

**“I promise”, I look at her. “I won’t shut down.”**

**(End of flashback)**

June 21st, 3031

“Alpha! Alpha”, someone calls a gender in the distance. “Alpha?”

My eyes fly open, sweat runs down my face as my breathing slowly slows down.

“Are you ok?”, someone looks down at me.

“Costia?”, my eyes adjust revealing the blonde. Weird thing is that I’m not disappointed, rather delighted. I sit up, rubbing my head. “What’s the time?”

“9:45.”

“Start a shower for me.”

Clarke nods and disappears into the bathroom.

_ Stupid memories… _

“Who’s Costia?”, Clarke walks out of the bathroom. 

“No one”, I get out of bed. “How’d you sleep?”

“The bed definitely made it easy to sleep”, the blonde smiles at me. 

I can’t help but smile back. “That’s good.”

********

“Raven”, I walk over to Raven. “Who’s Costia?”

Everyone seems to freeze at the name. Luna looks at me.

“What were you doing upstairs?”

“I slept with Alpha last night, she invited to sleep in her bed. Who’s Costia?”

“Can’t say”, Luna goes back to braiding Raven’s hair. “When Lexa is ready, she’ll tell you.”

“When I’m ready for what?”

I freeze at Alpha’s voice.

“Are you talking about me?”, I feel her eyes on me. Her voice has a hint of anger but mostly outlined with curiosity… and something else.

“N-no.”   
“Are you lying?”

“Yes”, I look down.

Alpha walks over to me, she stands in front of me. She flicks my head. “Don’t be so tense.”

I eye her. “Are you going somewhere?”

Alpha holds out clothes. “We’re going somewhere”, a smirk spreads across her face.


	11. Screws and Bolts

“I’m done”, Clarke turns and faces me.

I nod but don’t respond, though my eyes stay on her. They seem stuck. I know I should look away but all I see is Costia, not Clarke, Costia.

_ God, I miss her. To her smile, laugh, and personality. The way she could cheer you up without trying. Just her presence was enough to make you feel at ease. Why’d I put her in Costia’s clothes? _

The yellow shirt I bought Costia is probably gonna smell like Clarke now, the overalls fit perfectly. All that’s missing is the white cat hairpin.

“Wait one minute”, I disappear upstairs. When I go downstairs I put the hairpin in her hair. “It works… I suppose.”

Clarke eyes herself in the mirror. 

A hand on my back forces me to look away from Clarke. Instead my eyes find Luna. She offers me a smile, one that says it all.

_ She’s not Costia… _

I shake my head not wanting to talk about it. 

_ Even though she’s not Costia, doesn’t mean she can’t be _

********

Looking at myself in the mirror, I feel like she put these clothes on me for a reason. The clothes smell of cookies.

_ I don’t feel like myself. _

When I look at Alpha her face seems to scream sadness. I can tell she misses someone, she has a hole in her heart. For some reason, knowing this makes me rather sad. Makes me feel bad about something… like it’s my fault. 

Alpha looks away from Luna. She looks at the ground like her answers are written on the floor.

_ I’ve been there. _

“Do you remember what I said last night?”

“Bed shopping?”, I tilt my head.

“That’s it, I have to buy a few things. Groceries and stuff, you’re coming with me.”

I nod.

“Good”, Alpha extends her hand. “We’ll take a car, nothing fancy, try to stay hidden.”

I look at her hand. 

_ Do I take it? _

When I look at Alpha, she’s waiting. Her eyes don’t reveal anything. Reaching out, I take her hand. She leads me out of the house and to a garage full of cars.

When we’re in the grocery store, I keep close to Alpha. She seems to know what she wants. She’ll mumble if she has to make a decision of what to get. 

“Hey, Co- Clarke”, Alpha looks at me. “Could you get the bread?”

I nod and walk off. Once I’m in the bread aisle I feel someone touch my arm. I look at the man. A man with shaggy looking hair smiles at me.

“Hello little lady”, he runs his hand down my arm. “You alone?”

“N-no.”

“Why don’t we have fun?”

“I just came for bread”, I try to walk around him but he steps in my way.

“Where you going?”

“Please… leave me alone.”

“shouldn’t you be grateful to an Alpha!”, he grabs my wrist.

“Alpha!”, I scream out to Lexa. 

“I’m right here”, the man chuckles.

“Lexa! Lexa!”, I scream at the top of my lungs.

“Let the girl go Bellamy”, a voice speaks behind me.

The man lets me go. “Didn’t expect to see you here.”

“I’m shopping”, Alpha grabs my wrist and pulls me to her.

“You got yourself a new bitch.”

I tune out the rest of their conversation. Once we’re in the car Alpha is silent.

“I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault.”

I nod and keep silent for the rest of the ride.

_ We didn’t get a bed. _

I look out the window to see cherry blossoms.

“Well get out, don’t just sit in the car.”

I get out of the car and look around. A pond has fish swimming around. Ducks casually walk across a bridge that goes over the pond. Cherry blossoms seem to fall around me. Smiling I catch one. “This is so beautiful.”

“Knew you’d like it”, Alpha smiles at me. She walks over to me, “do you remember the white cats?”

_ I haven’t been here before. _

I shake my head.

“Right, c’mon then”, Alpha walks over to a bush.

Peeking in I see five white kittens. They wrestle around in the bush. “Cute”, I don’t really care for the cats. I like the cherry blossoms better. 

Alpha’s smile widens. “Here”, she hands me one.

I look at it in my arms. Its eyes stare up at me. “Y-yeah, it’s… pretty?”, I set the cat down before standing up. “I wanna look at the fishies.”

I notice Alpha frown but she doesn’t say anything. “We should actually get home.”

“Fine…”, I glance at the pond before following her to the car.

********

“What brings you down here?”, I look at Luna.

“I knew you weren’t sleeping, did Costia 2.0 not do what you wanted her to do?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Clarke isn’t Costia, stop trying to make her Costia.”

“I’m not!”, I look away. “I just miss Costia.”

“Then get to know Clarke, maybe you’ll like her more.”

“Impossible, Costia was the one, then she got shot! It’s all my fault!”

Luna doesn’t respond, instead she holds out a hairpin. “She dropped this, well more of took it out.”

“Thanks”, I take the hairpin.

“Good luck on making a robot”, Luna turns. “I hope you have enough screws and bolts”, she disappears into the darkness of the halls.


	12. The Room

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

June 22nd, 3031

I wake up to the shower turning on. It’s nice waking up on a bed, but Alpha showers in the morning. I don’t mind but I like sleeping.

“Clarke”, Alpha walks out of the bathroom. “Come shower.”

_ She’s been more nice, though I still have the shock collar on.  _

After showering I follow Alpha downstairs. Julie runs over. I don’t hear their conversation but Alpha ends up getting mad. A loud slap sounds through the air. I look at Alpha who radiates anger. 

_ I forgot she was this mean, hanging out with yesterday some reason made me think she was nice, like a friend… you’re too quick to trust people Clarke. _

I swallow a lump in my throat. Alpha looks at me, causing my whole body to freeze. 

_ Is she mad? Maybe it’s because I’m not doing anything. _

“S-sorry”, I politely bow before turning to leave. 

********

“You should teach her to mind her own business”, Julie looks at me. “And to stop trying to be Costia.”

I look at Julie. “Do you wish to be Costia?”

“Will you love me like you love the blonde?”

“I don’t like the blonde”, I step away from Julie. “And I don’t think you’ll ever be Costia.”

“And you think she will?!”

“She can try, in fact I’m going to start training her in sex, and I want you to be there.”

“Why?”

“Don’t ask questions”, I glare at her. “But you might get sex out of it… I don’t think Clarke will be good at it.”

“Then give up on her! Take me!”

Smiling I shake my head. “There’s a reason I don’t.”

Julie tilts her head. “Why do I have to be there?”

“Just because”, I turn and walk away. “See you later.”

********

I talk to Aya as the sun sets outside.

“She seemed so mad”, I take a sip from the cup. 

“You have nothing to fear”, Aya wipes the counter. “Master seems to like you”, she eyes my outfit.

“What?”

“Nothing”, she shakes her head. 

“Clarke!”

I tense at Alpha’s voice. “Y-yes?”

Alpha walks into the kitchen. “What are you doing?”

“Talking to Aya”, I look at Alpha. “Do you need me to do something?”

“Not right now, later maybe”, Alpha holds out her hand.

I glance at her hand not understanding.

“Glass, give me your glass.”

I hand over my drink.

_ That’s a weird thing to want. _

“I’ll go clean the living room”, Aya scampers out of the kitchen.

Alpha puts the glass on the counter. “I want you to come with me”, she turns and leaves the kitchen. I follow her upstairs and to a locked room. “It’s just a little something but it’ll have to work for your room”, she pulls a key out of her pocket. There’s a click as she unlocks the door. “Feel free to touch whatever you want”, she opens the door.

Walking into the room, I see someone else’s room. It seems to have a yellow, grey, and white theme going on. The baseboards are a grey white the walls are yellow, and the carpet a white. The bed sits under a window in the middle of the room. The curtains are yellow with white chevrons, the bed matches the curtains. The bed has two white pillows and a grey one in the middle. 

_ I think that’s a throw pillow. _

On both sides of the bed are white bedside tables. One has a lamp and a framed picture, while the other has an empty fish bowl. On the far right in the corner is a closet full of clothes. I see what I wore yesterday hanging in the closet. By the closet is a dresser full of god knows what. I do notice it has two locks on it.

_ That’s weird. _

To the left of me is a desk facing the wall. It’s neatly organized with a laptop on it. A white cat casually sits on the desk, licking its paw. In front of a grey rug lies at the end of the bed. A cat toy rests on it along with a pair of pink converse that stick out like a sore thumb.

“Over here”, Alpha walks over to a door. “Is your own personal bathroom. Aya just cleaned it so there’s that.”

I nod.

“Well I’ll leave you to settle in”, Alpha leaves the room, closing the door behind her. Once she’s gone I notice the C hanging above the desk.

_ Did someone else use this room? _

I feel very uncomfortable here, kinda like I’m crossing over someone’s property. I also feel eyes on me, not the cats but someone else’s.

“I don’t like this room”, I turn and leave the room. 

“Aww, I see you’ve gone in the room”, Raven smiles at me.

“What’s with that room?”, I glance at the door that even creeps me out.

“I don’t know if I’m allowed to tell.”

“I have to sleep in there, might as well tell me.”

“You might want to sit down”, Raven seems serious.

I sit on one of the tables in the hall.

“It all happened 3 years ago…”

(This is Raven telling the story, not a flashback or daydream)

**“What’s out there?”, Costia points outside.**

**“Trees, a forest, a flower field”, Lexa looks up from her phone, to look at the woman she loves dearly. “Why?”**

**“Can we go out there?”**

**“The sun is gonna set any minute”, Lexa stands up, putting her phone on the table as she does. “How about tomorrow?”**

**“I wanna go now”, Costia slips on her pink converse.**

**“Fine but only for a bit”, Lexa easily caves as the red heads request. She would do anything for the woman she loves.**

**The two females decide to go by wolf, both of them changing forms once outside. Costia was really excited to leave the house and do something, meanwhile, Lexa was tense and eyeing her surroundings. Every little noise making her growl.**

**“Oh calm down”, Costia runs up to her mate. “Everything is alright.”**

**Lexa sniffs the edge of the flower field before stepping in. A sneeze comes from Lexa causing Costia to giggle from a few feet behind her. Being excited, Costia runs past her, her tongue out as she runs deeper into the field. The crimson wolf plays with butterflies to her heart's content. She’s giggling as she jumps into the air to catch a butterfly, however a gun goes off and the giggling stops.**

**Lexa’s eyes widen but stays where she is. The whole forest seems quiet at the female slowly approaches the last place the red head was. An anguished, helpless cry sounds from Lexa as she finds the red head, motionless, and empty. Her blood slowly spilling out of her head.**

(That’s the end of Raven telling her story)

“What does that have to do with the room?”, I lean back on my hands.

“After that, Lexa carried Costia home, laid her on the bed, all wrapped up in clear wrap.”

“She laid a dead person on that bed?!”

“I think she removed the body after a year or so… she might’ve took it out yesterday when cleaning for you”, Raven leans forward. “Between me and you, I think she used the body as a sex doll.”

I don’t have time to reach as vomit comes out.

Raven steps back, “I’ll go get Lexa.”

“No”, I look at her. “I don’t wanna see her”, I wipe my mouth. “Where’s the body?”

“One minute”, Raven disappears downstairs. I hear what she says.

“Clarke just threw up, she said she was feeling dizzy.”

Alpha is the first up the stairs. “Are you ok?”, she scans me over. Her hand on my forehead checking my temperature.

I look up at her. I feel myself begin to shake as I look at her. The longer I look, the more I shake. A window flies open. I swear someone whispers something as the window whistles.

_ “Don’t fear” _

Shaking my head, I look away from Alpha. “Air, I need fresh air.”

Alpha eyes me. “Do you want me to a window or something?”

“No!”, I snap at her surprising everyone. I look at the open window. “Can… can we actually close that?”

“Of course”, Alpha glances at Julie.

Julie closes the window.

I notice Alpha’s hand on my shoulder. The contact freaks me out for some reason. Shaking my head I get off the table. “Outside, I wanna go outside.”

“Are you sure we can’t open a window?”, Alpha glances at a window.

I shake my head.

“I’ll take her”, Raven grabs my wrist, dragging me away.

I can feel Alpha’s eyes on me as I’m dragged down the stairs. Once we’re outside, Raven lets me go.

“Way to make it obvious”, she glares at me. “Now Alpha is suspicious of me.”

“I’m sorry”, I look around. The front yard seems rather… relaxing.

“Wanna see the body?”, Raven leans in.

“Is it gross?”

“I don’t know, would a body wrapped in clear wrap for two years be disgusting?”

“Yes.”

“There’s your answer”, Raven disappears into the darkness. I have to follow the sound of her feet to keep up. The farther we get into the darkness, the more a certain smell shows up. Raven shines a flashlight on something. “Look in”, she motions to the dumpster.

Cautiously I look in. Two eyes stare up at me. Screaming I leap back, landing on my butt. “What the hell!”

Raven peeks in and looks at me. “Poor girl”, she starts walking. “C’mon, we got things to do.”

“Like?”, I catch up to Raven.

“Go to sleep”, Raven smiles at me.

I walk into the house, my eyes wide as I step in.

“Do you feel better?”, Alpha looks at me from the couch.

“Y-yeah”, I head up the stairs, stopping at the door. “A-Alpha.”

“Yes?”

“I…”, I stare at the door. “Nevermind.”

“You sure?”, even though there’s no possible way of her seeing me from up here, I feel her eyes on me.

“Yeah, goodnight”, I head into the room.


	13. Note

A note so early in the story?! I know, I know, I just wanted to say that I have started a new story. I'mma gonna try to get a few chapters out of that before going back to this. This story isn't on Archive yet cause I want plenty of chapters written down so I have a general idea of what I'm doing. So please be patient as I update that story.

Edit:

So the story is gonna be called "Outside The Cabin", it's gonna focus on Clarke who was sheltered and grew up in a cabin, she wasn't allowed to see the outside world. Then she gets in a horrible car accident in the city that leaves her alone, now Clarke has always been curious about the world she likes the freedom. But she can't survive on her own, she ends up getting stuck with Lexa after Clarke learns to trust her but only one problem. Abby is desperate to get her daughter back.


	14. Mistakes

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

June 23rd, 3031

Lifting my head I look around the room. The cat sits on the bed looking at me, eyes narrowed. 

_ What is with that cat? _

I stand up, turning back human. "This room…", I look around the room, still feeling uncomfortable.

The door opens revealing Alpha. "I thought you would be sleeping", she walks over to me. She eyes me probably questioning my choice of sleep wear.

"It… it got hot throughout the night", I look at the closet.

"Breakfast will be ready in an hour", Alpha walks over to the closet, browsing through the clothes.

I move to sit on the bed but stop myself.

Alpha faces me, clothes in her hands. “These look good”, she smiles at her choice. When she extends her arm to give me the clothes, I flinch away. “Are you ok?”

“Y-yeah”, I step back, nervously itching my arm.

“Right, I’ll leave your clothes on the bed, don’t take long.”

********

I take notice of the way Clarke is acting. She’s awkward around Lexa, almost like she’s scared. I know Lexa noticed, I can tell by the looks she’s giving me. The dirty, dirty looks.

I think everything is ok until Luna pulls me out of the house. She asks question after question, all of which I answer with a “I don’t know”.

My cheek burns as a slap lands on my face.

“Raven! Tell me!”, Luna yells at me for the first time.

Looking up at her, I see someone new. Someone I don’t like, someone that shakes me to the core.

“I… I just wanted to tell her”, I look at the ground.

“Tell her?”

“About the room she was sleeping in, who it belonged to.”

“You told her the story?”

I nod, “y-yes”.

“That makes no sense, why is she avoiding Lexa?”

“I… I told her that the body was on the bed”, I glance at Luna. “That… it was removed yesterday. That Lexa used it as a sex doll.”

“She didn’t use it as a doll!”, Luna snaps at me. “God dammit Raven!”

“I’m sorry”, I step back.

“You might’ve screwed everything up! If Lexa finds out… she’ll scare Clarke into submission… just when Clarke was trusting her!”, Luna glares at me. “For every hit, scratch, mark, every ounce of pain she feels”, she steps closer. “That’s on you.”

“Sh-she wouldn’t hurt Clarke”, I look at Luna. “Right?”

“I don’t know at this point, Lexa’s beyond repair, all she wants is another Costia. And if Clarke isn’t what Lexa wants her to be willingly, then Lexa will force her…”

_ What did I do? _

********

Once Raven and Luna leave the house, Alpha stands up, her eyes still on me.

I sit at the other end of the table, as far as I can get from her.

“You know”, Alpha puts her finger on the table. “You’ve been acting weird”, she starts walking towards me.

I squirm in my seat but don’t leave the seat.

“I know I’ve only known you for… less than a month but you reveal a lot”, she slowly gets closer. “Just your body language, from when you’re uncomfortable, happy, sad, mad, or just up right disgusted… I learned that yesterday”, she stops by my side.

I squish my hands between my legs, my eyes on my lap.

“Now, I’m not one to force people, I hate that”, Alpha leans against the table. “But that doesn’t mean I won’t do it, so you can tell me now or we can try something else.”

I tense up at her words, my head jumping to a million different conclusions.

I jump when Alpha puts a finger on my arm. “You’re shaking”, she smiles. “Just tell me, I won’t get mad”, her hand slowly moves up. “But I will get mad if don’t tell me.”

Her fingers goes up the side of my neck, running over my throat before stopping at my chin. “Well?”, she forces my head up so I’m looking at her. “What do you have to say?”

Feeling disgusted, I spit at her.


	15. Mask

(I think you guys already know what ******** means and all that)

Alpha pulls her hand back. I notice she looks angry as she uses a finger to wipe off the spit. “Yo-”

The door opens cutting her off. Luna glances at me then at Alpha. 

“Looks like I came at the right time.”

“One can say that”, Alpha moves away from me. She whispers something to Luna.

“Are you sure about that?”, Luna looks at Alpha. “She’s not ready.”

“Only one way to find out”, Alpha leaves the room. “Clarke, come with me.”

I don't want to move from my seat. My limbs refusing to move. I look at Luna, she doesn’t say anything.

“I would go, she’s already mad”, Raven looks at me.

Sighing I follow after Alpha. Alpha disappears into a room. Once I’m in, I’m slammed against a wall. Green eyes glare at me, an arm on my throat threatening to choke me.

“Don’t you ever, ever! Do that again!”, she presses against my throat. “Got that?”

I nod.

“You’re lucky, today I felt like being nice”, she steps back.

I rub my throat.

_ This woman isn’t who I thought she was. _

“Don’t look at me like that”, Alpha disappears into the darkness. “This was your doing.”

I stare into the darkness, not daring to move.

“Don’t just stand there”, Alpha turns a lamp on. It illuminates the room. “Get over here.”

********

“What did Lexa whisper?”

“Sex training.”

My eyes widen. “She’s gonna hurt that girl beyond repair.”

“Once again”, Luna looks at me. “Your fault”, she turns and leaves the kitchen.

********

I look at Alpha who stands by a chair, Julie kneels by a wall.

My eyes find abs, well toned abs, hot abs. A six pack! My eyes go down to see a smoothly shaved pubis area. My face heats up. I quickly look down. I can tell that Alpha is getting closer, walking closer. Too close.

“You guys studied human anatomy… right?”

When I don’t respond, Alpha growls. 

“I’m not happy right now so just answer.”

“Yeah…”, I trail off when I feel Alpha touch my chin. She has me look at her. “W-we did…”

“What Gender did you finish at?”

Swallowing a lump in my throat I answer, “Omega, we would’ve gone onto Alpha this week.”

“So you know nothing about Alphas?”

“I know some things”, I’m quick to defend myself. “I’m not dumb.”

“Ok, talk.”

“Uh…”, I feel like a librarian as I search my brain for answers. “Alphas are the highest breed. They have strong pheromones, and normally rule over other ‘genders’.”

“What about when it comes to sex?”

I shake my head. “I would never attend those classes.”

“Didn’t care about sex?”

“I was the only virgin…”, I try to shake the bad memories away. “They would tease me about it during any class that brought up sex. So… I would skip out.”

“Great, I can teach you.”

I eye her. My eyes land on Julie. “I don’t wanna watch two people have sex…”, I look at Alpha.

She laughs and shakes her head. “You’re not watching, you’re gonna be in it.”

_ A threesome! _

I step back. 

“Jesus”, Alpha shakes her head. Her anger probably rising. “Are you really that dense?”

“I’m sorry”, I bow my head. 

“You’re really that innocent”, Alpha grabs my chin, moving my head side to side. “Interesting”, she sits on the edge of the bed. “C’mere.”

I walk over to her.

“Kneel.”

I get on my knees, my eyes finding one spot. 

“I’m guessing you know female anatomy… you are one afterall”, Alpha sits on the bed, opening her legs.

I feel a lump in my throat. All I can do is nod at the question.

“Cute…”, Alpha leans back on her hands.

_ Why is she so calm about revealing herself to me? _

“Tell me… do you know everything about this area?”

I look in front of me. “Um… folds”, I lightly touch an outer fold. 

She nods. 

I look up at her. She raises an eyebrow. I look around avoiding eye contact. 

“This would be so much easier if I was doing it”, Julie mumbles the words. 

Alpha looks at me. I look at the ground, my hands holding onto my pants.

“Why’d you have to call her? I could’ve done it”, she glares at me.

“Shut up”, Alpha glares at her. 

I look in front of me. Alpha spreads her folds apart.

“Um…”, I look up at her. 

“Are you that hollow?”, she glares at me. 

“Sorry”, I look back down. 

Alpha sighs, shaking her head. “Why are you so innocent?”, she brings my chin up. She eyes me, she doesn’t say anything.

_ Will she hurt me? _

“I don’t know what I’m doing…”

Julie laughs in the corner, Alpha doesn’t say anything. Instead she crawls further up her bed. She slings one leg over the other. 

“Guess I will have to train you”, she lightly presses against a flat area on the bedside table. A drawer pops out and she pulls out a bottle of wine. “Want some?”, she eyes me.

“May I?”

“I was hoping you would”, she smirks.


	16. Wine

******** = pov (point of view) change

_ This _ = someone’s thoughts

I watch as Alpha tilts the bottle. It slowly spills out, moving down her body. It fills in every part of her. It slowly goes between her breasts.

I look at Julie who is basically drooling. I can see she’s struggling to stay still.

“Why are you doing this?”

“I just want sex… get rid of anger you caused”, she moves the bottle away, carelessly tossing it towards Julie. Julie licks the top. “Still want some?”

“What happens if I don’t?”

“Then you leave the room, Julie takes over, you continue gardening. Getting electrocuted”, Alpha carelessly shrugs. “The usual”, she wipes some of the wine before licking her finger.

“And if I do… taste the wine?”

“Then… we’ll see what happens from there”, Alpha waits for an answer.

Shaking my head I crawl onto the bed. Julie watches me, her eyes wide.

“Why are you scared?”, Alpha looks at Julie.

“If… if she licks the wine… does she become the sex slave?”

Alpha looks at me, a hint of fear.

_ Afraid that I heard that? _

I pretend not to care as I sit on my knees between Alphas’s leg. Reaching out I run a finger in a circle on her abs.

_ I wish I could bite her, get rid of her. Run from this piece of shit… I also don’t wanna get hurt. _

I lean forward licking some wine. I ignore Julie’s crying as I slowly move down. I don’t know how much I have to lick but it actually tastes good. But I feel disgusted that I’m doing this… this isn’t me. I sit back licking my lips.

Alpha has a smirk on her face, her eyes running up and down my body. “I’ve decided not to take your virginity, maybe later”, she leans forward.

_ She was gonna do that?! _

********

Leaning forward I gently rub Clarke’s cheek.

_ She reminds me so much of her… _

I look down.

_ Why am I treating her this way? Maybe there’s a hope that I can replace this hole in my heart… maybe she can be the new… Costia. Maybe, but it’s all false hope. _

********

I stare at Lexa. She seems to be thinking about something. Something serious. She looks back at me. 

_ What’s with this girl? I should feel scared, I am. I don’t know what she’s going to do… yet I feel comfortable. Like it’s nothing. _

When I look away from her eyes, I feel disgusted again.

“Clarke-”

“I wanna leave, let me go back to my room.”

Alpha nods, “you can leave then.”

I’m quick to leave the room, my feet carrying me up the stairs. I stop in front of ‘my’ room. Raven’s words coming back to me.

“What’re you doing?”

I turn around to see Raven.

“You’re not hurt”, she eyes me over. “What a surprise.”

“Hurt? Why would I be hurt?”

“Luna said Lexa would hurt you to get answers”, Raven looks at the closed door.

“Answers?”

“To your strange behavior, the way you’ve been acting all day.”

I shake my head not wanting to talk. “Listen, I’m not feeling too well.”

“Because of the boyd?”

“No… just, I can’t shake this feeling. It feels like something is biting my stomach, over and over again”, I put a hand on my stomach. “It just won’t go away.”

Raven eyes me. “The feeling of disgust?”

“I don’t know, can we talk later?”

“Sure, hey uh… why don’t you take a nap? I hear your body heals the more you sleep.”

“You’re probably right”, I smile at Raven. 

I walk into the room, closing the door behind me.

“Mreow”, the cat rubs against my legs.

“Who feeds you?”, I crouch down.

The cat pushes its head into my hand before turning around. It jumps on the bed, then through the open window.

“Independant cat”, I smile at the thought.

_ I would kill to be that cat. _

Sighing, I flop onto the bed. My eyes snap shut as soon as I hit the mattress.

********

I stare up at the ceiling, Julie’s tongue running over me repeatedly.

“I’m bored”, I push Julie off me.

Julie looks at me, her eyes wide.

_ How long has it been since Clarke left? _

I look at the clock on my bedside table. “An hour”, I whisper the words. I get off the bed, putting on some clothes.

“Not gonna shower?”

“Were you hoping I would let you join me?”, I glare at her.

Julie doesn't respond.

“Don’t overstay your visit”, I leave the room. “Where’s Clarke?”, I walk over to Luna.

“Uh… I don’t know.”

“She was sleeping upstairs”, Raven glances at me.

“Was?”

“I don’t know if she’s still sleeping, she might be sitting on her bed.”

“Thanks”, I head upstairs. I stop at Costia’s door, my eyes sweeping over the door and the design.

_ God, this seems like such a long time ago. _

(Flashback)

**“You know what we should do?”, Costia sits up on the bed.**

**“Finish your studying”, I flip through her math book.**

**“No”, she grabs the book, tossing it to the floor. “Paint.”**

**“Did we not just paint yesterday?”**

**“We did but I wanna paint my door”, Costia looks at her door.**

**“What color?”**

**“Yellow, green, maybe some purple.”**

**“Why?”**

**“I don’t know”, she crawls onto my lap. “Make this room seem more like** **_my_ ** **room.”**

**“We can do that”, I kiss her head. “Whatever makes you happy.”**

(End of flashback)

Shaking my head, I open the door. Much to my surprise I see Clarke sleeping on the bed. She’s fast asleep, her fingers twitching every now and then.

I walk over to her, my finger gently brushing against her cheek.

“Hmm”, Clarke nuzzles into her pillow.

_ Cute. _

I sit on the edge of the bed. “Why are you so much like her?”, I lean forward, brushing hair off her face. 

_ She’s so perfect. _

An image pops into my head, Clarke sits on a blanket in the grass. A baby in her hands, a toddler standing by her. In the distance a woman chases a kid. Her brown hair blows as the wind blows. The kid has a smile on his face, which helps you notice a missing tooth. It doesn’t take long for me to realize the woman is me. The kid I’m chasing has blonde hair and brown eyes. He looks like me. The toddler by Clarke resembles Clarke beyond belief. Not just her face but her outfits too. Even that smile. The baby has green eyes that stick out among anything else. The hair is brown with a blonde streak.

_ Family? _

I shake my head.

_ How can you think about that? This woman won’t even tell you the truth. _

“What are you hiding?”, I whisper the words, careful not to wake Clarke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a question but based on the short description of the kids what would you name them? Or call them, we all know Clarke and Lexa are destined to be together. I imagined two endings, one where they have kids, other where they don't. So I don't know if they will have kids but yeah... I don't know.
> 
> Edit:  
> I wrote these quick chapters hoping that if I updated today, I could focus on my other story for the rest of the day and not feel bad for not putting an update up today.


	17. Note

I'm typing this on my phone so I apologise for spelling mistakes, I also have a Google keyboard which changes words for some random reason 😑🙄. Anyways, I decided to put my other story on hold for a second. I'm on a writer's block when it comes to that story. So I'll be focusing on this story, get updates, blah blah blah. Also I do have 2 more chapters but I normally write at least 3 chapters out, in case I wanna change something from the previous chapter(s).


	18. Chapter 18

********

I wake up to the creak of the bedroom door. Groaning I roll over hoping to fall back asleep, but it never comes. I lie in bed, staring at a wall. The feeling of being watched clings to me but I shrug it off, thinking it’s the cat. When I roll over my heart skips 10 beats.

“Alpha?!”, I look at her, my eyes wide.

“Sorry”, she smiles at me.

My eyes follow her as she walks over to the bed.

“You look so peaceful when sleeping”, she sits on the bed. “I thought you were dead for a second, that was until you started rolling around”, she looks at me, her eyes clouding over.

_ Is she still mad? Maybe she’s here to punish me… take my virginity? _

Alpha reaches out, her finger lightly brushing my cheek. “Why the look?”

_ Why so gentle? _

I shrug, my mouth refusing to say words.

“You look troubled… what’s wrong love?”

_ Love? What’s up with that? _

I shrug, again.

“I have an idea”, she smiles at me. It’s like her mood from earlier, is gone. “A hot bath should relax you, I prefer them a few minutes after I wake up.”

I watch Alpha head into the bathroom. Once she’s out of view, I look at the door. I could leave but what good does that do?

“Clarke.”

I look at the bathroom, Alpha stands in the doorway.

“You coming?”

********

Luna and I sit in the living room, the silence unbearable. Neither of us saying a word. Luna seems fine with the silence as she scrolls away on her phone, a smile popping up every now and then. Me on the other hand, can’t stand the silence. I want answers.

“Luna.”

She hums in response, not bothering to look at me.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

“I just… are you mad?”

Luna sighs, putting her phone down. “You know”, she looks at me. “I feel like you’re not apologizing to ‘fix’ our relationship.”

“I have no other reason to apologize.”

“Yes you do”, she bites her bottom lip, eyeing me. “You feel guilty.”

“That’s why I’m apologizing to you.”

“Well you’re apologizing to the wrong person”, she looks back at her phone.

_ Then who? Who do I apologize to? _

********

I stare at the tub full of water, bubbles start appearing.

“Gonna get in?”, Alpha runs her finger through the water. “It’s warm.”

I look at her. “Ok”, I start undressing. Once I’m undressed, I step into the tub. Alpha takes my hand, keeping me balanced. Once I’m sitting, she lets go of my hand. I feel my body slack as the hot water warms me up.

_ This is nice. _

“Scoot forward.”

I scoot up in the tub, the water sloshing around me as I move. Legs appear on either side of me, arms wrap around my waist, pulling me backwards. My fear shoots up as I feel restricted. 

**Water fills my mouth, threatening to drown me. My voice comes out in nothing more than gurgles, a few bubbles float to the top. The farther I sink, the farther the light gets. I feel like a brick in the water, sinking, and sinking, until rock bottom. Left there to grow old, break to nothing. My body shakes, trying to cough up the water but it only lets in more water. My eyes close, only to open again when a distant sound rocks the water. A humming sound fills my ears, relaxing my body.**

I stare at the water, listening to Alpha humming. Her humming reminds me of Dad, him humming me to sleep when I was younger.

Alpha’s hand gently strokes my stomach in a relaxing pattern.

“Clarke.”

I tense up at her words. The feeling of relaxation going away and the feeling of being hunted, comes back.

“I need you to answer a question, can you do that?”

I nod.

“What’s up with you today? Did someone say something?”

I shake my head.

“Then explain your mood”, a finger runs up my spine, sending chills up and down me.

“Bad… dream?”

“I don’t believe you”, Alpha’s hands disappear. I feel her grab my hair, yanking my head back. “We can do this the easy way”, she kisses my neck. “Or the hard way… your choice”, a wet tongue runs down the side of my neck.

“Bad dream”, I repeat my earlier words.

Alpha scoffs, her tongue drawing circles on my neck, then she bites my throat.

I immediately try to get away, my instincts kicking in. Though I stop when Alpha bites down harder.

She lets go, licking where she bit. “You know”, her finger runs down my throat. “You have a good body”, her finger runs around my breast before going down between them. “Do you work out?”

I shake my head. “I… I’m just always moving”, my hands shake under the water.

“Explains a lot”, her finger stops at my stomach. “Do you wanna say the truth… or should I go further?”, she looks me in the eyes. Her green eyes causing my breath to hitch in my throat.

_ Snake like eyes… I’ve always hated snakes. _

“Further it is”, Alpha’s hand disappear from sight. I feel it on my thigh, slowly moving up, running over my pubis area before moving down the other thigh. When her hand gets close I blurt out a name.

“Costia!”

Alpha freezes, her eyes wide. “Where did-”

Someone knocks on the door. “Clarke?”

_ It’s Aya. _

I breathe a sigh of relief. “Yeah?”, I scramble away from Alpha.

“Do you think you can help me clean the living room? I can’t reach high places.”

“Of course”, I quickly dry off then get changed. I look at Alpha, she sits still. Her eyes scanning the water for answers.

_ Looks like that name brought back memories. _

“You dead or something?”, Aya knocks again.

“No, I’m coming”, I leave the bathroom, Alpha’s eyes burned into my thoughts.


	19. Chapter 19

“So I just need you to clean the fan and high places”, Aya points out a few things. She hands me some supplies. “I’ll be cleaning the lower areas.”

I nod and start cleaning. “Hey Aya”, I look at the woman.

“Yes?”

“I can’t reach that place even with this stick like thing… can you help?”

“How?”

“Get on my shoulders.”

“I’m not doing some crazy cheerleader shit”, Aya shakes her head.

“Trust me.”

When she’s on my shoulders, I grab onto her ankles. She starts cleaning the fan, a chill runs up me when I feel eyes on me. The sound of nails tapping fill my ears.

“You ok? You’re shaking”, Aya glances down.

“I’m fine”, I steal a glance upstairs. The sight of Alpha makes me jump. 

“Clarke!” Aya shifts on my shoulders.

The chair under us wobbles before falling over. Aya and I fall back onto the couch, both of us groaning.

Aya looks at me. A smile appears on her face before we both break out laughing. Alpha shakes her head, she starts walking down the hall. Her figure is barely visible when she looks over her shoulder and at me. A smirk on her face, once that spikes my curiosity.

“Don’t do it blondie.”

Screaming I move away. I look at the person only to see a smiling Raven.

_ What is with everyone and being so silent? _

“You’re jumpy”, Raven sits on the edge of the couch.

“Don’t do what?”

“Follow Lexa… she’s just trying to get you up there, alone with her.”

“What happens then?”

Raven shrugs, “go ask Julie, she has plenty of stories.”

I stand up and head into the kitchen. Julie cuts up fruits, stopping when she sees me.

“You’re alive”, she eyes me. “Still shaking though.”

“Raven said-”

“I could hear you guys”, Julie dumps the fruit into a bowl. “I don’t have much stories… not that would describe the pain you would feel if you followed her”, she watches her hands. “But I can tell you that when Master finally has herself to you, and she’s mad… then you’ll wish you’re dead.”

_ How mean is Alpha? _

“Now leave”, she shooes me away with a spoon.

The day seems to pass by rather fast, I don’t encounter Alpha and it’s already 8pm. Then she walks down the stairs, proving me wrong.

“Luna”, Alpha stops at the bottom of the stairs.

“I’m ready, I’m ready”, Luna walks into the living room.

Raven pauses the showe we were watching, Luna leans over the back of the couch, talking to Raven.

“Hey”, Alpha lays her hand on my forehead, making me look up at her. She leans forward whispering, “take this time to think about your answer.”

I flinch when she nips my ear. “I already answered”, I want to look into her eyes but I feel like I’ll fall into a trance. “It was a bad dream.”

“Sure, tell yourself that”, she pats my forehead before her hand disappears from my head.

Once their gone Julie speaks up.

“I would tell her”, Julie glares at me. “She always gets what she wants, so just take the easy route.”

“She’s not a wimp like you!”, Aya looks at Julie.

“But she is smart”, Julie looks away.

********

“It’s not like you to leave the house”, Luna sits across from me.

“I felt like doing something, is that so wrong?”

“Doing something? Or coming up with a way to scar the blonde?”

“Do you think I’m going to hurt her?”

“No… you care too much to do that”, Luna takes a sip from her drink. “But you’re trying to scare her, convince her you’re going to hurt her.”

I nod. “I’m not gonna lay a single harming finger on her.”

“Better hope she doesn’t realize that too soon.”

Laughing I shake my head. “She probably hates my guts, thinks I want to eat her”, I smile. “She has a powerful mind”, I use my straw to make swirls in my drink, a faint smile on my face.

(I’mma be honest, I have no idea what these are… I guess they could be day dreaming… or just a thought that I describe but I don’t know what they are)

**The woman in front of me, the one I don’t wanna let go, walks by me. Her hand playing with her left ear. I smile, she does that unconsciously.**

**“Hey Lexa”, she breaks the silence.**

**“Hmm.”**

**“You made a promise a long time ago.”**

**“Yes, I did.”**

**“Why’d you break it?”, she looks at me.**

**Red turns to blonde, brown eyes turn to blue.**

(I feel like I said Costia had blue eyes… I don’t know so now she has brown)

**“You promised to move on.”**

**“I’m trying.”**

**“Are you though?”, the blonde tilts her head. “Or are you trying to copy what’s impossible?”**

**“I’m not.”**

**The blonde turns away, she starts walking. Her blonde hair turning back to red.**

**“Costia…”, a single tear runs down my cheek. I feel someone pull me into a hug.**

**“Don’t cry.”**

**_That voice._ **

**I look up. “Cl-”**

“Lexa!”

I look up at Luna. “Yeah?”

“What’s wrong?”

“I… I don’t know”, I wipe away the tears.

“We should go drinking”, Luna stands up. “Clear your mind.”

“You’re probably right.”


	20. Drunk

June 24th, 3031

********

“Hey, they’re fine”, Aya tries to calm Raven down.

“It’s already 2 in the morning.”

“They probably when to get something to drink, Lexa isn’t herself”, Julie glares at me.

“And it’s not Clarke’s fault”, Aya glances at me.

“Sure seems like it”, Julie keeps her eyes on me. “Ever since she showed up, Lexa has been all over the place.”

Aya doesn’t respond.

“See? Even you know she’s a problem… she has to go.”

“Hey! I don’t see why you hate me.”

“You’re annoying, you ruined everything!”

“Is this because Alpha doesn’t love you?”, I glare at the woman, purposely saying things I know will hurt her. “She treats me better than she treats you, and I haven’t been here that long.”

“You bi-”

The door swings open.

“Claaaarke!”, Alpha wobbles in. “Where… sheeee”, Alpha eyes the whole room. She starts crying when she spots me.

I glance at Luna who shrugs.

“Don’t leeeeave me again”, Alpha leans on me. “I thought *hiccup* you love… eh.”

_ What the hell? _

“I loooove yooou!”, she pinches my cheeks. She points at Julie. “Not *hiccup* you… who aaaare you?”

“Is she drunk?”, I look at Luna.

“Drunk for *hiccup* you”, Alpha forces me to look at her. “Cutie”, she smashes her lips against mine.

My eyes widen. Alpha’s tongue seems to explore every part of my mouth, when she breaks the kiss, a string of spit goes from her mouth to mine.

I look around for help. Everyone stays where they are, even Luna.

Alpha lays her head on my chest, her fingers playing with the band of my pants. When I think she’s asleep, she says something. “You won’t leave… right?”, she looks up at me.

“Do I have a choice?”

Alpha looks away, “I don’t know”, she nuzzles into my chest. A sigh escaping her mouth. She climbs onto my lap, getting comfortable.

I find myself listening to her breathing, listening as it slows down. My fingers run through her hair.

_ Feels like silk. _

“Wow… you actually put her to sleep”, Luna smiles.

I look up at her. “Do something.”

“I can’t lift Lexa.”

“Yes you can.”

Luna shoots a glare at Aya.

“Sorry”, Aya stands up. “C’mon Julie.”

Julie seems stiff as she heads upstairs.

“Goodnight”, Luna drags Raven away.

“Those assholes”, I mumble the words.

********

The sunlight hits my face slowly waking me up. Everything seems blurry. The worst headache knocks about in my head. When my vision is clear, I see Clarke. She lies by me, her head comfortable under my chin.

_ What the hell happened last night? _

I don’t find myself disgusted by the situation… rather comfortable. Unconsciously I lay a kiss on her head. A click sounds off.

“So cute”, Luna smiles at her phone.

“Delete that”, I growl at Luna.

“You’ll have to fight me for it”, a smirk lies upon her face.

_ That asshole! _

********

I wake up to what sounds like wolves. The coffee table falls over, it’s glass top shattering. A black wolf wrestles with a silver wolf. They fight aggressively, drawing blood from one another. I notice they both seem to be heading towards the phone. When one of them gets close, the other yanks them away.

“Dam”, Raven sits on the back of the couch. 

The silver wolf throws the black wolf, making it hit the wall. I watch the silver wolf get down into a fighting stance. It stands over the phone.

“What are they fighting about?”, I look at Raven.

“Not my place to say”, she shrugs, a smile on her face.

The silver wolf stands in front of me. Teeth bared, the phone lies in the shattered glass. The black wolf starts walking forward until it looks at me. The wolf shakes its head, slowly turning back to a human.

“You win”, Alpha looks at the silver wolf. “Just don’t… do anything bad with the picture.”

The silver wolf turns into Luna. “I won’t”, she smiles. “It’s not like you to surrender.”

“Are we not gonna talk about last night?”

Everyone goes silent. I glare at Raven who just smiles.

“Should I ask or…”, Alpha trails off.

“Don’t know, are you prepared to be ashamed of yourself?”

“Hit me.”

“Well you walked in saying you loved Clarke, especially not Julie, just Clarke. Then you kissed her, like tongue and all then you passed out on her.”

Alpha looks at me which doesn’t help the situation.

I look at my hands, anything to avoid eye contact.

“Well shit”, Alpha sits on the far side of the couch. “God dammit”, she runs her fingers through her hair.

“You were drunk”, I look at her. “It’s all just words.”

“Should I tell her? Or do you wanna?”, Luna rubs her hands together. “Please let me tell her.”

“You’re way too amused for this”, Alpha glares at Luna.

“Lexa tells the truth when drunk”, Luna slaps a hand over her mouth. “Whoops.”

_ Tells the truth? _

I look at Alpha.

For the first time, she looks uncomfortable. She plays with a ring on her finger, twisting it in a circle.

“Do you… you haven’t… we”, I look at Luna. “I don’t get it.”

“I think you do, just don’t wanna believe it.”

“Ok, I’m hungry”, I stand up. “I’m going to eat breakfast”, I quickly leave the living room. Alpha’s eyes follow me.

“Way to make an awkward leave”, Julie slides a plate across the counter.

“Thanks”, I sit down.

“So how do you feel?”

“About?”

“Knowing that one of the most powerful Alphas like you.”

“She probably doesn’t like  _ me _ .”

“Then who does she like?”

I shake my head. My eyes go down to ‘my’ clothes. I think about the room upstairs, that red head I saw in a dream and what Raven told me.

_ Am I just a replacement? _


	21. Chapter 21

Sorry for not updating in days, things are just crazy at my house. School starts in a little over a week so I'm trying to get all that handled. I'm gonna try and update tomorrow. Thanks for the patience 😘


	22. Fishing (a short story)

Note: I know I don’t have to put notes in the story but eh, so I decided to write this short story just to make up for the lack of updates. This short story won’t affect the story at all. I have one more chapter to write then I’ll post them. How long will that take? I have no idea, it’s really hot at my house and I get frustrated in the heat. I get lazy, and don’t do anything. I literally roll around not wanting to do anything. I’m surprised I convinced myself to sit down and write this. Onto the short story!

(A random summer day)

“I’m so hot!”, Raven kicks her feet in frustration. “Luuna!”, she whines the blue haired woman’s name.

“What do you want me to do?”, Luna fans herself with a paper plate.

“Something!”, Raven snaps at her. The heat messing with her emotions.

Looking away from the couple, I spot Julie. She sits at the kitchen counter, head on her the counter as she sweats a puddle. I can tell she wants to start lunch but can’t bring herself to do it.

“You hot?”

I look up at Lexa...

(I’mma be honest, I couldn’t decide if Clarke should call her Alpha or Lexa. In the main story, Clarke knows Lexa’s name is Alexandria and she knows that she can call her Lexa. She hears Raven and Luna refer to her like that all the time. She’s well aware she has a name but she calls her Alpha, for whatever reason)

She’s leaning against the window, wearing nothing but a sports bra and underwear. Her hair is up in a high ponytail, a sucker in her mouth as she looks down at me.

“Well?”, she takes the sucker out with a pop.

“Sorta, not too much though.”

Lexa nods. She looks away, seeming to think about something. “How ‘bout this…”, she smiles. “Put on that bikini on your bed, and I’ll take everyone out to the beach.”

Everyone lifts their head at the word beach. All eyes are on me.

“Yes!”, Raven’s up in a second. “Go put that bikini on Clarke”, Raven grabs my hand. She starts dragging me up the stairs.

“Isn’t this too revealing?”, I look at myself in the mirror. “I’m basically naked.”

“Why do you think Alpha bought it?”, Raven tosses a towel at me. “But we match”, she smiles at me.

Heading downstairs, I head into the living room. Everyone waits in there, all of them in a swimsuit. Everyone but Lexa, she stands in shorts and a tank top.

“Not swimming?”

“I’d rather watch from afar.”

“Can we go fishing?”, Aya drags a few poles into the living room.

“Sure, everyone get in the car.”

The ocean water laps at my feet, cleaning the sand off. Looking away from my toes, I look at the ocean. The blue makes me think of diamonds. A whale’s tail sinks into the ocean.

“Reminds me of you”, Lexa stands by me. She looks at me, her eyes scanning over my body. A hungry look in her eyes.

“How?”, I take a tiny step away.

“Your eyes.”

I look at her eyes. “Yours make me think of the forest.”

“Right, you gonna fish or what?”

I have to force my feet to bring me to the rocks. Everyone sits on the rocks, poles in their hands.

“How long does this take?”

Aya doesn’t get a response from anyone.

Time slowly starts ticking by. Everyone but me has a fish. 

“No fair”, I look at Lexa.

“Hmm…”, she bites her bottom lip. “I’ll be right back… I have to use the restroom”, she’s off before anyone can say anything.

Luna watches her walk away. A second later her eyes widen before she blurts something out. “A dolphin!”

“Where?!”, I look for dolphins.

There’s a few moments of silence.

“I don’t see no dolphin.”

“Hey Griffin, I think you got something”, Raven taps my shoulder.

I look at my pole. Something tugs at the end.

“Here”, Raven reels up the string, revealing a flopping fish.

“That’s huge!”, I admire the fish.

“Why are you screaming?”

“Alpha! I caught something!”, I look at Lexa. “W-why are you wet?”

“Don’t ask questions”, she climbs onto the rock. “That’s big.”

“Sure is”, I smile at her. “I finally caught one”, I look at the ocean.

I notice Alpha mouth thanks to Luna.

“What’s with the goofy smile?”, Julie flicks my cheek.

Smiling I shake my head. 

“Clarke! Clarke! The fish!”, Aya reaches for it.

I try to catch the fish but it makes it to the ocean before I can. I hang my head, “fishy.”

_ All of Lexa’s efforts… gone to waste. _


	23. Masks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will probably upload two more chapters. These are the chapters I'm confident in and want to be in the story... if that makes sense.

I shake my head.

_ I shouldn’t jump to conclusions. Maybe Alpha actually likes me for who I am. But… she used a dead person as a sex doll! _

“Hey, you good?”

I look up to see Raven. “Y-yeah… just thinking.”

“Wanna tell me?”

I look around. “Not here… I probably shouldn’t say it at all.”

“Why?”, she tilts her head.

“I don't have evidence and I’m not one hundred percent positive.”

“Are you jumping to conclusions?”

_ How did… _

Raven smiles. “You’re easy to figure out. Just focus on the faces you make and you can decode you faster than lightning”, she winks at me.

_ I need to work on that. _

********

“I’m going upstairs”, I walk past Luna. My feet carry me to the office.

Once I’m in the office, my mind tries to figure out a way to smooth things out. A way to get me back on top. Frustration builds up in me at the thought of Clarke being on top.

“She’s higher now that she knows… I have to figure this out”, I whisper words to myself. “I have to act a different way, but she’s smart… she might figure that out.”

My fingers snap over and over again. Snapping fills the room, fills my head, drives me to the point I can’t stand to be in the house anymore.

_ I have to do something, get something done. _

I smile. “I’ll figure the blonde out before she figures me out. Get ahead of her… she is just a placeholder.”

_ What’s the best way to figure someone out? Sex, of course.  _

********

“Clarke!”

I jump at Alpha’s voice. When I turn around, Alpha stands a few feet away. “Y-yes?”

“You said you were a virgin”, she looks at me.

“I… I did.”

“Has anyone touched you?”

_ She seems rather desperate to know. _

“No”, I look at the ground. “Not exactly…”

“What does that mean?”, fear shines in her eyes.

“Well… there was a guy named Finn. He… he was kinda a bully.”

“Did he touch you?”

“Forcefully but wouldn’t do anything too bad, just his fingers would touch something I’d prefer he didn’t”, I look at Alpha. She doesn’t respond as her eyes stare at something in the distance. Without a word, she turns and walks away.

“Follow”, she commands me over her shoulder.

I glance at Raven. She doesn’t say anything but a look of fear and worry shines on her face.

“Clarke!”

I quickly follow after Alpha. “Where are we going?”

“We’re leaving this house, maybe eat at a Cafe, do something.”

“Why me?”

_ I can ask questions, get answers. _

“I don’t know.”

“Do you treat your maids like this?”

Alpha shakes her head. I watch as she picks up a pair of shoes and gives them to me.

_ Ugh, I hate this style. We should go shopping. _

I put on the shoes and follow her out of the house. “Then why are you treating me like this?”

“I don’t know!”, Alpha snaps at me. She mumbles something to herself before getting in the car.

********

“What are they gonna do?”

Luna shrugs. “Lexa is known to do many things… especially when frustrated.”

“Is she trying to remake Costia?”, Aya speaks up from where she sits.

“I don’t know, I think she’s just mourning in her own weird way.”

“Why the blonde?”, Julie looks at Lune. “I’ve been here for that last 2 years.”

Luna offers a smile. “Lexa must see something in her, I think Lexa actually likes Clarke.”

“Meaning?”, Aya leans forward.

Luna shakes her head, not wanting to reveal too much.

I look at my hands.

_ What crazy shit are those two doing out there? _

I look at the window.

_ Where did they go? _

********   
“Alpha! Alpha stop!”, I try to pull her off Finn.

Alpha pushes me back with her hand and continues attacking the man. Everyone in the bar stares at us, keeping their distance from the scene. Alpha slowly turns into a black wolf that bites into the throat of Finn.

I step back, a hand over my mouth as the blood slowly pools towards my feet. Finn’s feet helplessly shake as the wolf dives into a feast. The blood soaks at my feet, I feel like I’m swimming in the blood, my mouth being filled as I slowly suffocate.

The wolf steps away from the body, blood dripping from it’s jaw. It looks at me, green meet blue. My whole body freezes, not knowing what to do I reach out to the wolf. Alpha walks over to me, touching her nose on my palm before turning back to a human.

“Let’s go”, she whispers the words.

“What happened!”, Julie runs over to Alpha. “Why are you bleeding?”

“Not my blood”, Alpha shrugs Julie off. Alpha looks at me and I physically flinch at her gaze. She doesn’t say anything as she walks away, to her room.

“Let’s get you cleaned up”, Luna smiles at me.

“Why would she kill him?”, I look at the bath water. 

“Lexa does weird things.”

“I know that! Trust me.”

“How do you know that?”

“Raven told me, she told me about Costia. That there was a body on ‘my’ bed, that she would rape that doll.”

“Do you believe everything you’re told?”

I shake my head. “I don’t believe Alpha likes me.”

“What do you believe when it comes to that situation?”

“I don’t know anymore”, I look at my hands.

Luna doesn't respond. She calls Raven in.

“Where are you running off to?”, Raven looks at Luna.

“I’m gonna check on Lexa.”

Raven nods, watching Luna walk away. Once Luna’s gone, Raven sits on the edge of the tub. “Way to rat me out.”

“Huh?”

“This room is rigged with hidden cameras and mics, she hears and sees everything you do”, Raven whispers the words.

“Were they for Costia?”

“I honestly don’t know”, Raven looks up. “Can I tell you something?”


	24. Lights, Cameras, Secrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd figured I'd say that I actually have more chapters but I'm not as confident as I would like to be when it comes to them. I've written out how I want the rest of the story to go but now I need to finish writing a few chapters, read over them. Add a few things, change a few things. Remember what I added or deleted and see if it affects the other chapters.

********

I wait for Lexa’s reaction but I get nothing. I watch as she stares blankly, her eyes full of rage.

“What’re you gonna do?”

“What the hell am I supposed to do!”, Lexa glares at me. “I had everything under control, it was all going according to plan then Raven, walks in and fucks everything up!”

“Did you really have everything under control? You just killed a man in front of Clarke”, I shake my head. “She said what you wouldn’t, she didn’t keep Clarke in the dark like you.”

“I kept her in the dark for a reason!”

“Ok, so you are planning on having Clarke replace Costia, right?”

Lexa nods.

“And did Costia like secrets?”

“Not exactly…”

“So say you succeed, you seduce Clarke, she loves you, you’re happy… you have your ‘Costia’.”

“Where is this going?”

“Wait”, I put my hand up. “So Clarke loves you, then she somehow figures out… let’s say Raven tells her. Raven tells her about Costia, that she’s just a filler… now Clarke is mad at you. She hates you… now what?”

“Are you trying to prove that Raven telling Clarke did me a favor?”

“Yes, Maybe Clarke hasn’t figured out that you’re just using her. But at least she knows about your ex.”

Lexa doesn’t respond. “I just… I’m not mad about that… I wanna know… I don’t know.”

Luna smiles. “Are you mad about her knowing your feelings?”

“I don’t like her!”

“I know”, Luna leans forward. “You love her.”

********

“But… why would she want me to be Costia?”, I look up at Raven.

Raven shrugs. “Misses the red head.”

“But I’m not her!”

“Better start acting like it.”

“I’m Clarke, Clarke Griffin. The only child of Jake and Abby Griffin. An Omega who should be waiting on people as I clean tables.”

Raven grabs a towel. “Try telling her that, anyways, I just told you this so you can watch your feelings. Don’t fall in love… you saw what happened to Julie.”

I stand up and step out of the tub. Raven wraps the towel around me. “What happened to Julie?”

“She was like a dog when it came to Lexa”, Raven wraps a towel around my hair. “She loved her so much, she thought Lexa loved her… can’t blame her though, Lexa played her and in the end left her as soon as someone else showed up.”

“No wonder she hates me”, I crack a smile. “I wish I never showed up here.”

“Shh”, Raven looks around. “Listen, I told you all this cause I’m fine with Lexa beating the shit out of me… but if she hears you say that, then oh boy, you are gonna regret it.”

“Sorry, I forget about the cameras.”

“Now, hurry, get dressed.”

When Raven and I leave my room, we spot Luna at the bottom of the stairs. She looks up at Raven, a look on her face.

“Gotta go”, Raven hurries downstairs, only to be dragged away by Luna.

I spot Alpha. She sits on the couch, scrolling through shows.

_ Maybe I can talk to her. _

“Alpha?”, I head over to the couch.

She scoots over on the couch, leaving me a spot.

I sit by her, smoothing my dress under me before I do. “What’re you watching?”

“Nothing.”

“Right…”, I look at my hands. My eyes end up finding my outfit. “This is a pretty dress.”

Alpha looks at me through the corner of her eyes. “I suppose”, she looks away.

“Where’d you get it?”

“I can’t remember.”

“Must not be new”, I look at her.

“No, it is not new.”

“Did you buy it for someone?”

_ Maybe I can get her to say something about Costia. _

Alpha thinks for a few seconds. Her hands stilling on the remote. “Why are you asking such questions?”, she looks at the remote. Her finger running over a button.

“Just wondering.”

“Don’t lie”, Alpha looks at me. “Raven told you the answers to most of your questions… especially these ones”, her look turns into a glare.

“I guess”, I move away, trying to put distance between the both of us.

Alpha growls, she gets on all fours and starts moving closer.

I scoot backwards, eventually scooting up to the front of the couch. I look around, hoping for an escape.

Alpha puts her hand on the left side of my head. Her fingers grip onto the couch. Her other finger runs up my throat, stopping at my chin.

Looking into her eyes, I see she’s fighting with herself. She shakes her head, her lips lightly brushing against mine.

“You shouldn’t be so scared all the time”, she kisses my neck. “I’m not going to hurt you”, the kiss gets lower. She pulls the top of my dress down, gaining access to the top of my breast. “I could never”, she bites down.

Yelping I look down.

Alpha looks up at me, a smile on her lips. It widens when she looks over my shoulder. A wicked gleam in her eyes.

Someone coughs behind us. “I hate to interrupt but… Luna has requested to talk to…”

I turn around, seeing Julie.

“Ya’ll have wrong timing”, Alpha climbs off me.

Once she’s gone, Julie smacks me on the back of the head.

“What the hell”, I glare at her.

“You’re going down the same path I went, don’t do it… it’s not worth the pain.”

“Why does everyone keep saying that?”

“Master, or Alpha as you call her… she knows how to play with people’s feelings. She makes you think she loves you then she throws you away”, Julie laughs. “She loves seeing people in physical, emotional, or mental pain especially if she’s the one that caused it.”

“Raven told me… this all has something to do with Costia.”

“A mourning widow”, Julie doesn’t say anything else. Instead she heads to the kitchen.

_ Widow? _


	25. Phone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Figured I might as well upload this one. I read it over and didn't see how I could change anything.

**“Hi.”**

**I turn around to see a woman. She smiles at me.**

**“You have questions.”**

**I nod.**

**“Well let’s start out with the usual. My name’s Costia Woods or was Costia Woods.”**

**_Woods?_ **

**“Yes… I was married to Lexa. Willingly?”, she smiles. “Well… I think you’ll figure that out soon enough.”**

**“How?”**

**Costia shrugs. “You’re a naturally curious girl. You already made people talk more about me than they ever would, you also have friends in the house”, she looks at me. “But you’re asking the wrong people.”**

**“Who do I ask?”**

**Laughing she shakes her head. “You know the answer to that.”**

**_Alpha..._ **

June 25th, 3031

I jolt awake, my eyes wide from fear.

_ I’m getting tired of those dreams. _

I leave my room, ready to clean or do something. When I go to the living room, Aya runs up to me. 

“Morning”, she smiles at me.

“Morning.”

“Master said to have you clean the bathroom with me.”

“Which one?”

“Hers”, Aya hands me gloves. “It’s not that messy but has some nasty things.”

I follow Aya to the Alpha’s bathroom. It’s a big bathroom. The tub is a step up from the ground. A tiny river like stream runs around the tub. Tiny fish swim around, a tiny waterfall feeds the water keeping it full. The shower serves as a sauna and shower. 

“Don’t let flies in”, Aya smiles at me.

I smile back and start cleaning. It’s silent as we clean. I’m not surprised, I don’t really know Aya. She’s really nice… kinda like a little sister.

Aya breaks the silence. “You brought the topic of Costia back up.”

“How so?”

“I overheard Lexa and Luna. They were talking about her… Lexa used to hate us even saying that name.”

“Do you know what happened?”, I look at her.

“I know as much as you, Costia was shot in a field.”

“How’d you know I knew about the field?”

“I hear things.”

“Did they ever find out who shot her?”

Aya goes silent. “Can… can I tell you something? I never told anyone this.”

I look at her.

“I… I think it was Lexa.”

“Why?”

“She was drunk the night Costia was killed, coincidence?”

“Night?”, I look away. “Raven said it happened in the daylight.”

“Nope, it was night. Lexa was gone for the whole day, went to drink to get rid of anger.”

“Why was she angry?”

“Costia was acting up, not behaving. She just wanted to leave the house, go back to her life.”

_ She wanted to leave? I thought Costia was happy here... _

“I might have to ask Alpha myself”, I whisper out loud.

“What’s with Alpha?”

“I don’t know, you’ve known her longer than me.”

“No… why do you call her that?”

“What… do I call her?”

“Master, we call her Master”, Aya heads to the trash to take it out.

“What are you guys doing?”

I scream and turn around. Alpha leans against the door.

“We just finished cleaning your bathroom”, Aya politely bows. 

“Great, breakfast is ready if any of you are hungry”, Alpha looks at me. 

I feel her eyes follow me out of the room.

“Did you sleep ok last night?”, Raven sits by me.

“As good as I could with you and Luna having sex all night.”

“Hey, don’t be jealous”, Raven smiles.

“The words you were saying, god you guys are gross!”

“It was a huge di-”

Luna slaps her hand over Raven’s mouth. “That’s enough.”

“Luna!”, I say her name with excitement.

“Yes?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Depends, what are you gonna ask?”

“Truth be told… you probably won’t like the questions.”

“Then don’t ask them”, she takes her hand off Raven’s mouth.

“But-”

“Clarke!”, arms wrap around my neck from behind. 

I look up. Alpha smiles down at me.

_ What is she doing? _

“Morning?”, I say it like a question.

“Wow, fine”, she moves so she’s sitting on the table.

I look up at her. I can tell she has things to say.

She reaches out, her hand on my shoulder. She moves her hand up, up my throat, stopping at my chin. I’m forced to look up at her. “Hmmm”, her thumb runs over my lips. She leans forward, her lips touching mine. “Someone called”, she wraps her arms around my neck. 

“Who?”

“I don’t know”, she brushes hair off my face.

_ Why is she so flirty? _

I don’t respond.

“Do you know an Abby?”, she tilts her head.

“My mom?!”

“Oh, that’s who called.”

“I have to call back”, I stand up, moving away from Alpha.

Alpha leans back on her hands, one leg over the other.

I search the whole house for a phone but there’s nothing. “Why the hell is there no phone?”

I hear the beep of numbers being typed on a phone. Walking into the kitchen, I see Alpha has a phone. She holds it out to me. When I reach out to take it, she pulls her hand back.

“You have to do something.”

“What?”

“Uh uh, just say yes.”

“But… I don’t know what I’m saying yes to.”

“I suppose you don’t”, she tosses the phone in the air only to catch it. “It could be sex, freedom, going outside, or just cleaning a room”, she tosses the phone again. “But who cares? All you have to do is say yes.”

“Is it something bad?”

“You’ll know once you say yes.”

“But I can’t just say yes.”

“Bummer”, Alpha turns off the phone. She holds it over a glass of water, slowly lowering it. “Three”, the phone gets closer to the water. “Two”, the bottom touches the water. “O-”

“Yes!”

Alpha smiles. “That’s my girl”, she tosses the phone to me.

“What did I say yes to?”

“A date.”


	26. Date

********

I watch as a bunch of emotions flood onto Clarke’s face. One second she’s mad, next she's sad, confused, disgusted, and so on.

“A date?!”

I nod.

“Why a date?”

“Why not a date?”, I tilt my head.

“It’s just…”, Clarke looks at the phone. “You go on a date with the person you love.”

“I know that.”

Clarke stares at me. 

_ Now she’s confused. _

“Lexa, can we talk?”

I nod, following Luna out of the kitchen. She heads outside.

“What the hell are you up to?”

“What’d you mean?”

“Taking her on a date, kissing her… acting affectionate.”

I shrug. “Why does everything I do have to lead up to some master plan.”

“Cause everything you do does lead to a master plan.”

“Not this.”

“You never took Costia on a date, why Clarke?”

“Maybe that’s where I went wrong… I’m hoping for a better outcome with Clarke. One that doesn’t get her killed!”

I mentally smile when I see Luna’s face show sympathy.

_ Play the sad card and anyone will believe you. _

I frown.

_ Now I just gotta keep everyone out of my way as I ‘love’ Clarke. _

Walking into the house I spot Clarke. She stares at the phone.

“Did you call your mom?”, I ask the questions from behind her.

She nods. “She said she managed to get the money from the principal.”

“And?”, I walk around her. Opening a cupboard, I search for the wine.

“She was planning on selling me anyways.”

“That’s life as an Omega sweetcheeks”, using my teeth I manage to open the wine bottle. I start chugging the drink, stopping when Clarke says something.

“She was gonna sell me out to men.”

“Happens all the time, you’d be surprised”, I take a sip of wine. “In fact that’s how most Omegas are born, some slut fucks a million men an-”

Someone slaps my arm.

I look at them mouthing ‘what?’.

They motion to Clarke.

Through the corner of my eyes I can see her looking down. Her body shaking as she holds back tears.

_ Did she not expect to be sold? _

I look around at everyone. They all seem to be glancing at me, waiting for me to do something. Raven pushes me forward.

_ What the hell am I supposed to do? _

“Cheer up love”, I set the wine bottle down and wipe my mouth.

_ Can't even enjoy a bottle of wine. _

Clarke looks up at me. Tears run down her face.

_ Great, she’s crying. Costia never cried. _

I look at Luna. “Help me”, I mouth the words.

Luna leans against the wall, shaking her head.

“There, there”, I lightly pat her head.

Much to my shock Clarke hugs me. Her face buried in my chest, the tears now soaking my shirt.

_ So gross. I just got this shirt! _

Sighing I wrap my arms around her. Maybe if I comfort her, she’ll stop crying.

********

The kitchen’s filled with silence. My mind focuses on Lexa’s hand going up then down my back. Her other hand holds my head to her chest, which is surprisingly comfortable. Lifting my head, I rub my eyes. 

“You ok?”, Alpha looks down at me.

“Yeah”, I nod. “Sorry… I ruined your shirt.”

“It’s fine”, she looks at the wet spot. “I’ll just change.”

“Can I taste that?”, I point at the wine bottle.

“You already have.”

“I… have?”

Alpha ruffles up my hair. “You know, you’re surprisingly cute when you cry.”

_ Change of subject. _

“Thanks?”

_ Is that a compliment? _

“You could be an ugly crier”, she smiles at me.

I nod.

“Now go get dressed.”

“For?”

“Our date.”

_ She was serious. _

“Go”, she shooes me away.

(An hour later)

“Hold onto my hand”, Alpha gives a command as we head towards a crowd.

Reaching out, I grab her hand. She pulls me through the crowd as I look around. “Why is it so busy?”

Alpha shrugs. “Who knows.”

“Why’d you take me out?”

“I don’t know.”

We walk into a fancy restaurant. Alpha talks to a woman. I notice people looking at us, some snap photos of us while others stare.

“Ignore them”, Alpha whispers in my ear.

_ I forgot she wasn’t popular. _

We’re lead to a booth. I sit across from Alpha. Out of instinct I reach up to move my bangs out of my face, then I remember the hairpin.

“How do you always know where to place the hairpin?”

“What do you mean?”, Alpha looks up from the menu.

“You always do my hair, the hairpin seems to move with every hairstyle.”

Alpha shrugs. “I just… move it where it’ll keep hair out of your face.”

Looking out the window, I swear I see Costia. She stands across the street before turning and walking away. I lean forward, hoping to see where she goes. I feel a kiss placed on my forehead.

“What are you looking at?”

“I… I thought I saw someone”, I sit back.

_ I should get answers. _

“Are you still mad?”

“About?”

“Me not telling you”, I look at her.

“Nah, I already know. Raven told you about… her.”

I nod.

_ She’s talking about Costia, right? _

“Let me guess, she said she was shot, in the field of flowers.”

I nod.

“Then… why do you look so confused?”

“Aya said it was during the night… you were drunk but Raven said it was during the morning.”

Alpha seems to think of an answer. “Everyone will put a twist to a story, no matter what.”

“So then what’s the truth?”

“If I told the truth, would you believe me?”

Her smile sends a chill down my back. I hug myself and look out the window.

“I’ll be right back”, Alpha walks away with a frown.

“Well if it isn’t Clarke.”

_ That voice. _

“What do you want Poppy?”

“Oh nothing”, she sits by me. “What’s it like fucking the Alpha?”

I don’t respond.

“So you are fucking the Alpha”, she sits by me.

“Can you do this later?” 

“Let’s face it, you don’t leave that house.”

I look at her.

_ How does she know that? _

“Have you been stalking me?”

“No!”

“Then how do you know I don’t leave the house?”

“You never left your house when you were free.”

“You have been stalking me!”

“Everyone at the school knew these things.”

“No, just you.”

Someone coughs. I notice Alpha.

“You must be Poppy, Clarke talks about you.”

Poppy smiles. “Really?”

I’m forced to sit silently as Poppy and Alpha talk.

_ I didn’t even get any answers. _


	27. Bellamy

“Poppy seemed so nice”, Alpha leans back in her seat.

I don’t respond.

_ Why am I mad? _

“Anyways, have you decided what you wanted to eat?”

I nod. The rest of the ‘date’ consists of Alpha asking me questions. Trying to get me to talk. I just nod or shake my head. Sometimes I’ll shrug.

“Come again”, a woman politely bows.

Alpha smiles at her. I silently follow behind her.

“Hey… I’m sorry for killing Finn or whatever his name was.”

“It’s fine”, I mumble the words. My head feels foggy, everything seems to spin. I bring my hand to mouth, pheromones swarm the air. I stumble forward, my hand reaching out to Alpha, but I’m met with nothing. I look around. “Alpha?”

People glance at me as they walk by, none of them Lexa.

“Clarke!”

“Alpha”, I push through the crowd. A hand sneaks around my waist pulling me backwards. My mouth is covered as I’m dragged into an alley.

“Nice to see you again.”

There’s chuckling as everything goes black.

********

“Calm down, we’ll find her”, Luna sets her phone down.

“You don’t know that!”, I glare at her. “God dammit.”

“No one would want to hurt Clarke. She’s like a cute loli girl, too cute.”

“Plus we don’t even know if someone took her, she could be running.”

“She wasn’t running”, I look up at Luna. “She was calling ‘Alpha’ trying to look for me… then she stopped.”

No one responds. My phone goes off. I’m quick to answer. “Clarke?”

“Sorry to disappoint”, there’s a chuckle.

“Bellamy… what do you want?”

“I want so many things but first… there’s someone that wants to talk to you.”

“Lexa!”

“Clarke! Are you hurt? Did he touch you?”

“I… I’m fine.”

“Where are you?”

“I don’t know… I wanna go home.”

“That’s enough”, Bellamy’s voice rings in the phone.

“You fucker!”

“Hey, hey, if you want the blonde in one piece I suggest you do what I want.”

I wait for him to continue which earns a chuckle from him.

“I want money, a lot.”

“If you think I’m going to give you money then-”

There’s a scream as the sound of bones breaking sounds through the phone. I grip the phone in anger.

“I expect the money tomorrow.”

The phone goes silent.

“Dammit!”, I chuck the phone. 

“Did he… break her bones?”

I stand up, my body naturally starts pacing. My wolf screams for me to do something.

“Do we involve the police?”

“No! He would kill her before we could do anything”, I walk to the window. “Luna.”

“Yes?”

“Take a million out of my bank account. I want it in hundreds.”

“We’re gonna trade?”

“We’re gonna do whatever he says, I don’t care if I have to die! I’m getting that blonde back”, my hands grip the window sill. “I can’t lose her.”

********

“You know”, Bellamy walks around me. “You remind me of Costia.”

I watch him walk around, my eyes catching every moment. 

“Maybe that’s why Lexa likes you.”

When I don’t respond he laughs.

“But you knew that”, he sits on a chair. “Didn’t you?”

I nod.

“You have questions… you wanna know about Costia.”

I nod again.

“Then I’ll tell you something, Costia wasn’t always Lexa’s… in fact she was mine. She was my girlfriend! My mate but Lexa took her! She took everything from me! She would mock me, made a fool out of me. After that… my life went down the shit hole.”

“She’s dead”, I whisper the words.

“I know, I’m the one that killed Costia.”

_ He killed the woman he loved? _

“I wanted to take everything from LExa… so I thought I did, then you walked into the picture. But I had to confirm it, which I did in the grocery store. I knew she loved you and wouldn’t let you go, but now I have you. Now I can take everything from her.”

“Aren’t you giving me back?”

“Pfft, no! I’m gonna take all her money, her business, then kill you in front of her. Make her tremble before me.”

I look away, my head hanging.

“You’re cute, don't’ worry… I won’t take your virginity”, he smiles. “At least for now.”


	28. Trade?

June 26th, 3031

“You bitch!”, Bellamy raises his hand.

I close my eyes, preparing to be hit but a phone goes off.

“I wonder who that could be”, he lets go of my hair.

I stumble back, landing on my butt.

“Well, well, look who’s calling.”

I don’t hear what Lexa says.

“No, she’s fine. I haven’t laid a finger on her… isn’t that right Clarke?”

“Fuck off!”

Bellamy kicks me in the stomach before I can react. Blood flies out of my mouth, I lay on the floor coughing.

“Well… now she’s hurt.”

A few minutes pass before Bellamy crouches down. “Say something, confirm you’re alive.”

I glare at him.

He nods, motioning to the phone.

“A… Alpha?”

“Oh god”, she sighs a breath of relief. 

Bellamy holds up a piece of paper with words.

“I… I’m fine”, I read the words. “H-he’s been treating me nicely.”

“Your voice… what has he done?”

“That’s enough”, Bellamy stands up. “It was ni-”

“Warehouse!”

Bellamy quickly hangs up, he glares at me.

********

“Warehouse?”, I stare down at the phone. “There’s so many warehouses”, I run my fingers through my hair.

“Shall we go?”, Luna stands by the door.

I nod. We pull up to a busy parking lot. Bellamy stands by a car, Clarke by him. I notice she won’t look at me.

_ Is she scared? Does she think I’m gonna scold her? _

I eye her over. I notice bruises and dried blood.

_ What did he break? What bone? _

Bellamy pushes Clarke forward. She whimpers when she puts pressure on her right foot.

“I want the money”, Bellamy holds out his hand.

“Give me Clarke.”

“Don’t test me Woods.”

Sighing, Luna holds out the money.

Bellamy takes it. “C’mon Clarke.”

********

I hear Lexa yelling at Bellamy as I’m dragged away. Luna holds Lexa back. Putting my hands behind my back I position my arm at the appropriate angle. Lexa’s yelling slowly stops. I feel her eyes on me.

_ Please let her see it. _

I’m pushed into the car, the engine roaring to life.

“That was easy”, Bellamy lights a cigar.

Once we’re at the warehouse he notice my arm.

“What’s this?”, he reads the words on my arm. “You fucker!”

(An hour earlier)

The metal door slams shut. Once closed, I look around for something sharp. I find metal on the ground.

“Deep breath”, I close my eyes for a second. I have to grind my teeth as I carve into my arm the word “lake”.

_ Please, please notice this Lexa. _

(present moment)

“We have to leave”, Bellamy ushers me to the door. The sun is just setting outside. “We should have cover.”

I’m dragged behind him as he runs. I start whimpering as pheromones blast in my face.

_ Lex… _

Bellamy seems to smell them too. He freezes, his eyes wide as he looks around.

There’s a growl. One that strikes fear through me.

_ Why am I scared? I’m not the one who is gonna get hurt. _

Bellamy wraps an arm around my neck. From in front of us, green eyes stare us down. The pupils almost invisible as the wolf stalks closer. It’s white teeth shining like the moon. Bellamy presses a knife to my throat.

“Lexa”, I whimper the words.

The black wolf closes its eyes. The white teeth go missing. With the green and white gone, she blends in with the darkness.

_ Bellamy has no chance of survival. _

I listen for Lexa. There’s a growl then Bellamy and I go tumbling to the ground. Flashes of white appear then disappear. I feel something wet pool at my hand, a sour smell filling the air. The moon shines bright enough to illuminate Bellamy. His eyes blank as he stares at me. Fear shines on his face.

I scream, quickly moving away only to bump into someone. They wrap their arms around me in a protective way.

“You’re safe”, they whisper in my ear.

The person starts humming, their hands moving up my back then down. There a quick pain in my neck as I feel my eyes getting heavy before they snap shut.

********

When I head into the house, Aya is the first to greet me. She opens her mouth then closes it.

“She’s asleep?”

“Can you blame her?”, I use my foot to close the door. The wind makes it slam shut. Everyone in the house freezes, all of them looking at Clarke. She moves in my arms but stays asleep.

“I’m going to her room.”

“Do you really want her to sleep alone?”

“She’ll be ok”, I smile at Luna.

_ Do I want her to sleep alone? _

When I set Clarke on her bed, she wakes up. She looks up at me then around the room.

“Go back to asleep”, I brush hair out of her face. “It’s ok… I’ll be right here.”

I have to quietly shut the door behind me. I lean against Clarke’s door, my ears listening to her gentle snores. The gentle snores turn into a scream.

“Alpha! Alpha!”

I open the door. “Still here”, I walk into the room.

Clarke reaches out to me. “Sleep with me.”

“Nothing bad is going to happen.”

“Please”, she sits up. “I… I’m scared.”

I nod. “If you wish.”


	29. Note

Now some of you may be wondering why I put the whole kidnapping thing, especially because it only lasted 2 chapters. Well, I did it for a reason. Which you’ll see by the change of personality… mostly Lexa’s.

Also I start school tomorrow so I probably won't update until Friday, sorry. I have a few edits to make then you'll get 3 chapters on Friday. Thanks for your patience with this story


	30. Chapter 30

June 30th, 3031

********

Opening my eyes, I’m met with blurriness. I have to blink for my eyes to adjust to the brightness. When they do, I notice Clarke. She’s glued to me, her face pressed against my chest, her hands grip my shirt as though she’s afraid of me leaving.

_ I gotta get up. _

When I move, Clarke whimpers. Her grip on me tightening.

_ I don’t wanna wake her… _

I reach behind me, searching for a pillow to swap out for me. Clarke grabs onto ‘me’. Once I’m downstairs, I smell the sweet smell of cake.

“Who’s cooking cake?”

“Julie”, Raven glances at me. “How’s the blondie?”

“She’s fine…”

“How long were you up?”, Luna walks into the living room.

“She was up until 2, passed out.”

“Jesus… what did Bellamy do?”

“We can ask him ourselves”, Raven stands up. 

“I thought he was unconscious.”

“He just woke up, police figured we would want to say a few things to him.”

“We could just ask Clarke”, I sit on the couch.

“She hasn’t said one word since you rescued her.”

_ That’s true. _

“She might say something if she sees him”, Raven looks at me. “Just a thought.”

I nod. “Maybe, or she might piss her pants from fear. Remember everything and freak out.”

“Maybe… but we have to go.. honestly I’m surprised you didn’t kill him.”

I shrug. “Not in front of Clarke.”

_ Not again. _

********

“Not in front of Clarke.”

I look down at Lexa, my hands grip onto the banister.

_ He’s awake… why didn’t she kill him? _

I struggle to stand up, my cast holding me down.

_ I gotta take this stupid thing off. _

I head down the stairs.

“I just…”, Lexa trails off when she sees me.

I bite my bottom lip. When I look at Lexa, I see a jar. A jar that I can’t open, that I can’t get the sweets inside. Something… I want to get inside. But she’s just a jar of secrets…

“Go”, I look at her. “Bellamy.”

Lexa looks down, she crosses her arms as her nails tap on her arm. “Are you sure?”

I nod.

“Ok… but you can’t freak out”, she looks at me.

I nod.

“I really don’t want to do this”, Lexa glares at the door. Behind it, Bellamy lies. Lexa opens the door.

I step in, my eyes find Bellamy right away. 

_ He looks horrible. _

I walk over to the bed, running a finger along his cast before spotting the machine.

_ So this is keeping him alive? _

I feel someone grab my wrist. My eyes widen as I instinctively pull my arm away. I feel my heart speed up. My hand grabs onto my wrist, my finger tracing a blood vessel. I catch Lexa’s eyes. She shakes her head.

“You”, a raspy voice sounds from the bed.

I look down.

“Back… came back.”

I eye Bellamy’s beaten body. “Did… did it hurt?”

Bellamy doesn’t respond.

“All the pain you caused me… was it worth it in the end? Did you get what you wanted?”

“You’re not… dead so”, he takes a deep breath. “No.”

“Costia… you loved her?”

Bellamy nods. “More than you could know.”

“Did… did she love you?”

He nods. “She… she wanted t-to have… children.”

“And you?”

“I… I did not.”

_ He loved her, yet he didn’t want kids… did he know something bad was gonna happen? _

“How did she get in… in Lexa’s custody?”

“She took her.”

“I did not!”, Lexa growls from the back of the room. “She ran from you and you know it!”

I look down.

_ Was Costia ever happy? She runs from Bellamy only to be trapped at Lexa’s then killed by… Lexa. _

“Was she ever happy?”, I whisper the words.

“There were times”, Bellamy looks at the ceiling. “But… in the end sh-she was… like every other Omega.”

“Like every other?”, I glance at Lexa, mostly to see if she’s still there.

My fingers fiddle with my shirt.

“She wanted to be free, not owned”, Lexa leans against the wall.

_ I guess she had a dream. _

“I’m done”, I walk away from Bellamy, and past Lexa. I walk fast, only stopping when I’m outside.

“I’m proud of you”, Lexa appears by my side.

I nod, not wanting to answer.

“How about we get donuts then head home?”, she holds out her hand.

With hesitation, I grab her hand. I think about one thing as we walk.

_ What am I getting into? _

********

“Loosen up Woods”, Luna smiles at me.

“I’m fine.”

“You’re tense, you glare at anyone who gets too close to the blonde.”

I look beside me. Clarke stares at my phone as she plays a game. “I don’t know”, I tuck hair behind Clarke’s ear before looking at Luna. “I guess I have a fear.”

“Who would’ve thought, Lexa Woods, fearing something”, Luna laughs as she shakes her head.

“Were you afraid to lose Costia?”, Clarke mumbles the word as she presses restart on the game.

I pinch her causing her to flinch. “You oughta stop asking about her.”

_ The questions are getting more frequent… how close to the truth is this kid? _

“Anyways, why do you care so much?”, I tilt my head.

Clarke shrugs.

_ Blocked out. _

Sighing I look away, my guard back up as I watch people walk by.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know why but Clarke was giving me stubborn kid vibes. Like a kid that in order for them to do something you have to do something for them.


	31. Fair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’mma be honest with you guys, these next few chapters are gonna focus on Clarke and Lexa’s relationship. Trying to get them closer to one another so don’t be too surprised if nothing happens that isn’t too interesting. So feel free to skip a few chapters ahead if you want, but don’t be mad at me if you’re confused. You might not get confused at all… who knows.

********

“Have you decided what to eat?”

“Hmph”, I press the restart button.

“Hey”, Lexa takes the phone. “I’m talking to you.”

I look at Lexa. “What?”

“Have you decided what you wanted to eat?”

I shake my head.

“Well do you wanna look at the menu?”, she slides a menu over to me.

“No”, I push it away. “Can’t I have what you’re having?”

“I guess.”

I look away, and out the window. A van drives by, it’s colors shine brightly.

“Can we go?”

“Where?”

“The fair”, I tug on her arm. “Please?”, I give Lexa the best puppy eyes I can.

“That’s not gonna work”, she smiles to ease her words.

“Fine”, I slump in my seat, crossing my arms I glare at Lexa.

“You’re acting like a child.”

“Why can’t we go to the fair?”

“Cause.”

“Cause why?”, I lean towards her.

“I have things to do.”

“Yet you have time to stuff your face at this restaurant”, I mumble under my breath.

Lexa glares at me. “You arrogant br-”

“I can take her”, Luna cuts Lexa off.

I look at Luna. “Really?”

“Yeah, why not? I bet Aya and everyone else will have fun going too.”

I look at Lexa. “Can I?”

“I guess.”

We all wave bye to Lexa before heading to the fair. We meet Aya and Julie there, they already have our tickets.

“Where’s Master?”, Julie looks around.

“She has work”, Raven eyes Julie. “Why?”

“No reason”, Julie looks at the ground.

I take note of her blush.

_ She was hoping to do something romantic. _

I decide not to tease her about it, it’s not my place to do so anyways.

“I was meaning to ask, how was seeing Bellamy?”

I shrug. “Nothing interesting.”

I look in the direction of the hospital.

I look away a smile on my face. “Let’s forget about him, and enjoy the fair.”

“Yahoo!”, Aya jumps and punches the air.

********

When I stand up to leave my office, the phone goes off. I pick it, “Alexandria Woods speaking.”

“Are you the guardian of Clarke Griffin?”

“Yes I am, how can I help you?”, I look at the picture on my desk. The only picture I have her where she willingly smiled for me.

“We wanted to tell you that there will be a trial tomorrow for Bellamy.”

_ He’s not dead? _

“That’s great, does Clarke need to be there?”

“No, we’ll call again if we need her.”   
“Great”, I hang up.

_ I hope she’s ok right now. _

My drifts to the picture on my desk.

(I don’t know how long ago)

“Look, she’s finally smiling”, Luna points at Clarke.

The blonde chases Raven around, both of them in wolf form. Clarke leaps at Raven. Raven dodges her move causing Clarke to crash into the dirt, snout first.

“Eat dirt Griffin!”, Raven turns into a human.

Clarke glared at her, her wolf form slowly turning to a human. “Doesn’t taste good.”

“I bet it-”

Mud flies at Raven, coating her in it.

Clarke bursts out laughing, her laughter filling the air.

“Bleh!”, Raven spits mud out. “I think there was a worm.”

“Clarke, Raven, smile!”

Clarke looks at Luna then at me. She smiles wide, her pearly white teeth showing.

_ I'm never getting rid of this photo. _

(Present moment)

Shaking my head, I leave the office. I head to Clarke’s room to find the cat sprawled out on the bed.

“I’m surprised you’re still alive”, I pet the cat.

I walk around the room searching. “She hasn’t really touched anything… this doesn't feel like Clarke’s room.”

I crouch down, under the bed I find a box.

_ What’s this? _

“We’re back!”, the front door slams shut.

_ What time is it? How much time has passed since I left the restaurant? _

Clarke walks into the room, freezing when she sees me. She looks at the box in my hands before looking back at me.

“Uh… how was the fair?”

Clarke shrugs. “Fun, I got a stuff animal… what’re you doing?”

“Nothing”, I put the box under the bed. “I’ll be leaving now.”

********

I watch Lexa head to the door.

“Did you eat dinner”, she stops by me.

“No.”

“Great, do you wanna…”, Lexa trails off. “Nevermind, I’ll tell Julie to cook something.”

I nod.

Lexa leaves the room, closing the door behind her.

_ What was she looking at? _

I head over to the bed, crouching down and looking under. “Must be this box”, I reach out to grab the box. Once I have it, I sit on the floor and open it.

_ Letters… for who? _

“Mreow”, the cat swipes at my hair.

“Did you know about these?”, I look at a letter.

**Dear reader,**

**I’m writing those to… well I don’t know who. Maybe my plan doesn't end up working, maybe I’m gonna be the one reading this and realizing how stupid this plan was. But might as well write this in case my plan does work.**

  * ****Costia****



“Costia… did she write for fun?”

“Meow!”, the cat swipes again.

“Knock that off”, I lightly flick her nose. “Who was she writing to?”

“Clarke! You coming to eat?”

“Uh, yeah”, I put the box under the bed. When I’m downstairs, I feel arms wrap around me.

“You look guilty”, Lexa kisses my neck.

“I’m fine”, I crouch down, successfully slipping out of her arms.

Julie glances at Lexa but doesn’t say anything.

“Hey!”, Aya smacks me with a spoon, rice flying on my face as she does. “Are you listening?”

“Sorry… I was thinking about something, what did you say?”

“Nothing”, Aya looks at her plate.

“Hey”, I lightly nudge her. “Now I’m curious.”

“You don’t care.”

“Aww, don’t be that way.”

Aya looks at me. “What were you thinking about?”

“Nothing… nothing important”, it takes all my willpower not to look at Lexa.

I feel a hand on my thigh. I keep my eyes on my plate, my fork playing with my food. I feel Lexa squeeze my thigh.

_ What does she want? _

I try to move my thigh away, only for Lexa to dig into my skin.

“Ow!”, I look at Lexa. “What the hell?!”

“Finally”, she taps my cheek with her finger. “You’re acting strange”, she leans towards me. “What did you do?”

“Nothing.”

Lexa stands up. “Let’s go.”

I look up at her.

_ Go? _

“C’mon”, she takes my hand. “It’s nothing bad.”

I follow Lexa upstairs. She leads me to her bathroom, closing the door behind her.

“Undress.”

“W-why?”

“We’re going to bathe together.”


	32. Chapter 32

********

Clarke moves her hands, watching as the bubbles go with her. I lean back, watching the blonde in front of me.

“For someone who just met me, you seem rather comfortable.”

Clarke looks at me.

“I figured you’d still be guarded, still hate me. But instead you’re fine with bathing with me.”

The blonde shrugs. “I was taught at a young age, to trust your Alpha. No matter what, they’re the reason you’re alive. Don’t trust them… then good luck in life.”

“So that's why you’re trusting of everyone”, I move closer to her. My hands on either side of her. My nails tap the tub.

“I… I guess”, Clarke keeps her eyes down. Her face red from blushing.

Bringing my hand away from the tub, I tilt her chin up. A hunger from deep inside, one that I tried to bury, rises up.

_ What’s one kiss? It won’t harm her… _

My lips smash against hers. That hunger inside me gets stronger. My wolf growls at me for not doing more. It takes all my power to pull back.

Clarke covers her mouth. “W-why?”

I shake my head. “I don’t know.”   
“You… you said you loved me, is that true?”, Clarke tilts her head.

I let my hands drop into the bath water. “When… when I look at you, I see Costia. I see the woman that I lost, that I want back… but at the same time I see Clarke. I see a scared blonde who wants someone to love her, to protect her. To take her out of the internal cave she resides in. And”, I look at Clarke. “And I have a choice… get the woman I’ve always known back or… save you.”

“What would you choose?”

“I would choose-”

Someone knocks on the door. “The doctor called, Clarke is to go in tomorrow.”

“Thanks.”

I hear the person walk away.

“Let’s get out of water before we’re pruney”, I stand up.

Clarke looks up at me. She looks into my eyes, trying to tell my emotions by my eyes. I look away, my eyes searching for a towel.

“Hey, when we go to the doctor, don’t freak out. Now get out of the tub, and come dry off.”

When Clarke is asleep, I sit on the couch downstairs with Luna.

“Did you find out what she was hiding?”

“Nope but I think I have an idea.”

********

I wake up to rustling around the room. I try to fall asleep, figuring it’s the cat. There’s a thud then someone mumbles something. I feel eyes on me, staring at me. A finger runs down my cheek before disappearing. The door opens then closes.

_ Who the hell was that? _

“Clarke! We have to go!”, Lexa yells at me from upstairs.

“I’m coming! Give me in a minute!”, I search under the bed.

_ Where did they go? _

“Was that what the person last night took?”

I stand up and leave the room.

_ Why would someone take that? _


	33. Thorns

July 1st, 3031

********

(a few minutes earlier)

“Don't touch me!”

“It’s just a pinch”, the doctor reaches out to me.

Opening my mouth, I feel my mouth close around a hand.

“Clarke!”

(present moment)

Hugging my knees, I watch Lexa pace in the living room. She mumbles things as she does.

“I’m guess it didn’t go well”, Luna smiles at me.

I eye her before looking away.

“She bit the doctor!”, Lexa stops pacing. “Who bites their doctor?!”

“Apparently Clarke.”

“He was too close”, I avoid eye contact with anyone. “I… I panicked.”

Lexa sighs, “doctors. Don’t. Hurt. People.”

“You don’t know that!”, I look at her. “There are plenty of murderous doctors.”

“Name one.”

I look down at my hands. 

“Well?”

“Can’t… can’t think of any.”

“Exactly, and stop watching those murder shows. Just because it happens in Criminal Minds, doesn’t mean it happens all the time. Got it?”

I nod.

I feel hands on my cheeks. I look up at Lexa.

“I love you”, she looks me in the eyes.

“I know.”

She kisses my forehead. “Luna.”

The blue hair looks at Lexa. “Yeah?”

“We can’t have the doctor file against us, you know what to do.”

Luna nods before leaving the house.

“And you”, Lexa taps my cheek. “You’re gonna socialize, talk”, she lets me go.

“Question.”

“Answer.”

“Why did you get me?”

Lexa shrugs. “Your mom paid me to buy you.”

“Did… did you plan on falling in love?”

“Love? No one ever plans out love”, she shakes her head at the word ‘love’. “Some don’t even think about it, thinking it’s out of their reach. Others, dream of it and a perfect family.”

I notice she rolls her eyes at the word family.

_ Does she not want kids? _

“You?”

“I just go with the flow. See what I desire and what I don’t.”

_ She never said if she was in love or not. She dodged the question. _

I feel something deep inside me. A tingly feeling, one that makes me feel weird. I shake my head, the hairpin falling out. A frown forms on my face when I look at it.

_ Replacement… she doesn't love you. She loves what she wants you to be. _

I look at her Lexa. She’s looking at the hairpin. When she looks at me, our eyes meet. Neither of us say anything, but both of us think the same thing.

_ She knows… how long until this blows up? _

Lexa turns and walks away. Once she’s gone, Aya runs up to me.

“Let’s do something.”

“I’d rather not”, I stand up. Without the hairpin, my hair falls down. I realize how long it’s gotten.

“Master said you had to socialize, socialize with me.”

I nod, my fingers running through my hair. “Fine, what do you want to do?”

********

“What am I gonna do?”, I lean back in my chair. My arms hang as I stare up at the ceiling.

_ Would Clarke feel betrayed if I had sex with someone that wasn’t her?  _

“Why would she? We’re not in a relationship… but what friend kisses their friend and says they love them?”

The door opens. Luna walks in. “It’s done… are you ok?”

“No!”, I look at her. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do.”

“About?”

“Rut, I’m getting needy. I can barely sleep at night especially with Clarke around.”

“Then have sex.”

“That’s just it”, I stand up. “She doesn’t like people touching her, not anymore. Also I don’t know what kind of relationship we have, and what kind she thinks we have.”

“Sex gives you the answer… does it not?”

“It tells me about her body, not what she feels or knows.”

“If you’re that curious, then make her trust you. Then she’ll talk.”

“Or get closer to the truth.”

“Clarke is destined to find out, it’s her… she’s like Nancy Drew. Weird thing is that she does it so secretly that you’re not aware. She manages to ask questions that don’t seem too big.”

_ That’s what I’m afraid of. _

“Do what you gotta do, but you gotta stop getting a boner around Clarke.”

“I haven’t had a boner in months. I don’t even have a dick!”

“Not right now, but get too far into your rut and it’ll just appear on its own.”

I nod. “I’ll have to hit someone up.”

“Don’t wanna take her virginity?”

“I could never have sex with Clarke. She’s too innocent.”

“She’s 21.”

“Your point?”

“Nothing”, Luna shakes her head, a smile on her face. “I’m going to find Raven.”

********

Hiding under the table, I watch Luna walk away from the office door. “What’s rut?”, I whisper to Aya and Raven.

“Alpha needs to fuck”, Raven says it bluntly.

“Oh… does she have people to do it?”

“Yep… Julie used to.”

“Right… would I have to?”

“Based on what we heard, I doubt it. But you might wanna sleep in your room… you never know when her wolf will get the best of her.”

_ Her wolf… _

“Hey, you guys don’t happen to know how to get into her office… do you?”

“Are you sure you wanna sleep alone?”

I nod.

“K… did you shower?”

I nod.

“Let me feel your hair”, Alpha feels for wetness. When she approves she hugs me. “No screaming.”

“I won’t.”

“You know where my room is.”

I nod. “I’m 21, I can sleep by myself.”

“Sure”, she lets me go.

I turn and head upstairs.

_ I kinda feel bad, normally there’s a kiss before bed. _

Once I’m in my room, I’m greeted by the white cat. “Hello there”, I pet her head. “Do you ever leave this room?”

The cat looks up at me. Her blue eyes staring into me before she jumps onto the window sill. She sits down, her tail over her paws.

I crawl onto the bed. It’s cold, really cold. I lay down, my eyes staring in the darkness.

_ I’m fine, I’m fine. _

Sleep never comes as I roll around on the bed. I decide to get a drink of water downstairs. When I leave my room, I look at Lexa’s office door.

_ Maybe she has the box. _

Tiptoeing I sneak to the office. When I try to open it makes a rattling sound. A light flashes by the doorknob. Looking closer, I see a keypad.

_ I need a passcode. What did Raven say? Something about Costia. _

July 2nd, 3031

There’s a loud crash that startles me awake. I look around, a light shines under my door. Getting out of bed, I peek out of my room. A woman slowly walks down the hall. Her clothes torn, and wetness left where she walks. She turns to look at me. I notice a hole in her head.

I start screaming. “Alpha! Alpha!”, I stumble out of my room, landing on my butt.

The woman slowly gets closer. I scoot further back until the ground disappears from under me. I fall down the stairs, thudding fills the house. I notice some lights turn on.

Thinking quickly, I run out of the house. The wind blows in my face, sending chills up and down my spine. A dim light shines from Lexa’s room.

_ I’ll just climb. _

I start climbing the house, having to be careful. When I make it to Alpha’s balcony, I peak into her room. My eyes widen when I see a woman on the bed. She whimpers as Alpha does something.

_ Why are they so sweaty? Why is she whimpering? _

Alpha sits up, a pink balloon between her legs. She takes it off revealing a man’s dick.

I scream. I step back, my feet lose balance sending me over the edge. Thorns prick me as I land in a bush. I hear the slide of Alpha’s balcony door.

“What’s wrong?”, an unfamiliar voice asks.

“Nothing… just… I heard something.”

When I hear the door close, the tears start coming. When I wipe my eyes, I smear blood on my face.

_ Why am I crying? _

After half an hour of crying, my eyes get heavy. I feel myself go limp as I fall asleep.


	34. Running

The morning light shines in my eyes, waking me up. I whimper as I get out of the rose bush. When I’m out, I’m bleeding from many cuts, too many cuts.

_ Can’t let anyone see me. _

I use the backdoor, closing it behind me as quiet as possible. I’m almost to the stairs when Raven spots me.

“There you are.”

“You found her?”, Alpha runs down the stairs. “Why… why are you bleeding?”, she reaches out to touch me.

I step away, my eyes wide.

“Clarke?”

“Don’t… don’t touch me.”

“Do they hurt that much?”

“Just don’t touch me.”

Lexa steps back, her eyes flashing red for a second. Looking around I notice everyone looking at me. The Omegas cover their noses, a whimper coming from them every now and then. Luna stands by Raven, protective pheromones coming from her. It takes me a few seconds to realize I’m releasing aggressive pheromones.

I feel my inner wolf wanting to tear into someone, wanting to kill someone. Sink their teeth into flesh and swallow that person whole.

“Clarke, calm d-”

“Lexa?”, a woman walks down the stairs. She freezes when she sees me.

Lexa glances at her then looks at me. I can tell she’s afraid of what my next move is, everyone is.

I try to focus on calming myself down, clogging up my pheromones… but it doesn’t work. Instead I feel like I’m mentally curling into myself. Like something I’ve tried to lock away, is finally getting out.

“Margot, this is Clarke…”, Lexa glances at Margot. “Clarke, this is Margot.”

“Hi”, Margot waves to me.

When she waves, a breeze of a smell runs across my noise. That smell… is that Lexa?

There’s a pain in my chest as I see red. Everything goes black, I hear people yelling in the distance.

********

_ Is she gonna snap? _

“Hi”, Margot waves at Clarke.

Everyone watches as Clarke’s eyes flash red. She falls to her knees, her mouth foaming as she grips onto the floor. She curls into herself, her head on the floor. There’s a painful howl like noise. A golden wolf stands up. Its eyes red, mouth foaming as spit drops onto the floor.

“Has… has she gone rabid?”, Aya hugs herself.

“She would be in too much pain to move.”

The wolf shakes its head as though fighting with itself. It stumbles on its feet, some of it turning back to a human before going back to a wolf. It stays still for a few seconds before glaring at Margot. Its eyes fixed on her as it leaps at her.

For the first time in my life, I feel frozen. I know I should help Margot but I don’t wanna hurt Clarke.

It takes me seeing Margot’s blood for me to do something.

********

**“Clarke! Clarke!”, my name echoes in the darkness.**

**“Hello?”, I look around only to be met with darkness. The darkness flashes white. Canine teeth snap at me causing blood to splatter around me, coating me in. A light shines in the distance showing a wolf. A wolf that bites at something repeatedly, a wolf with a scary grin on its face. That wolf is knocked over by something, then my vision goes black again.**

I’m suddenly seeing colors, my surroundings. When I move, something bites down on my neck. They hold me to the ground. I start panicking then I realize it’s Lexa. I look up at her. Her eyes show anger and anger alone. Looking away I see blood. Blood on my paws and blood from Margot.

_ What did I do? _

I feel Lexa let me go. I’m quick to turn back to a human, my body shaking. Lexa turns back. 

“Clarke.”

I scoot away. “I… I didn’t mean to.”

“I kno-”

I turn and run before Lexa can finish. I stop at the border of the house, the collar already sizzling, waiting to shock me.

_ It’s just a shock… _

Sighing I crouch by the line. I stare down, the sirens sound in the distance.

“I didn’t mean to”, I sense Lexa behind me.

“I know”, she stands by me.

I wipe my eyes even though there’s no tears.

“Don’t start crying.”

I nod. The first tear rolls down my face. “I’m sorry.”

I feel a hand on my head. “C’mere.”

I stand up and hug her, the tears hitting me like a dam.

“Why are you crying?”

I shake my head.

“I need to know Clarke.”

I shake my head again. “No.”

“Lexa! She’s awake”, Luna calls from the house.

Lexa moves to walk away.

I grab her hand. “Don’t go.”

“I’ll be right back”, she pulls her hand away. “You’re welcome to come.”

I watch Lexa walk away. I step back, step away from the feeling of a thousand daggers digging into me. My hand grips onto my stomach, my head feels fuzzy.

_ Why does she care about Margot? Is… is she gonna be the new Costia? _

Without thinking, I turn and run. The shock only stings for a few seconds before disappearing. The collar makes a sizzling sound before going silent. I stop running listening to the sounds around me. I don’t hear anyone calling my name. The sirens are a distant sound that honestly sounds like humming.

I sit by a tree, my legs now shake and feel numb. “Stupid Lexa”, I wipe my eyes.

_ Why am I mad? _

I shake my head. I look down at my hands, they slightly shake.

_ That feeling… what was that? It wasn’t me. _

I start licking the cuts and dried blood off. The cuts have already started healing. I look around the forest.

_ Might as well explore, I don’t know when I’ll get another chance. _

Turning into a wolf I sniff around the forest. The more I walk, the more the smell of dried tar gets stronger. I stop at the side of a road, cars zoom by. Some of them dropping garbage as they do.

_ I wonder where everyone is going. _

I decide to head in the direction of the cars. By the time I reach the city, the sun is setting. The streets aren’t that busy, just the occasional person. No one seems alarmed with a wolf walking through. Some Alphas do stop to catch my pheromones. Well not mine, Lexa’s. I’m covered in her pheromones. I walk into an alley to spend the night. My mind drifts to ‘home’, to my room.


	35. Note

I’mma be honest, I’m just trying to get the relationship started. I already have everything written out, how it’s going to end. I just need to get at that point. I guess I'm trying to use Margot as a thing to get the relationship started but also remember Costia and the mystery behind her death and all that.


	36. Chapter 36

July 3rd, 3031

********

“You’re not gonna look for her?”, Luna sits by me.

“Why should I?”

“She’s your Omega… you’re responsibility.”

“If she wants to be an idiot and get killed then so be it”, I stand up. “Anyways, she’s on her way back right now.”

*******

Opening my eyes, I notice how busy the streets are. People push by one another, cars drive by. I stand up and head out onto the sidewalk. I keep my head down as I walk. I know I won't blend in considering I’m a gold wolf but I can try.

_ I have to get home. _

I don’t realize I’ve been running until I see the house. A figure stands in front of the door, their foot tapping. Getting closer, I come to see that the figure is Lexa. She glares at me, her arms crossed.

Turning back to a human, I walk up to her. My head hanging as I avoid eye contact.

“What the hell!”, she grabs my ear.

I yelp as she tugs on it.

“Where the fuck did you go?!”

I grab onto her hand hoping to get her to let my ear go. She drags me into the house, I’m now whimpering. I take notice that Margot is still here.

“Why’s she still here?”

“That doesn’t concern you”, Lexa lets me go.

I look up at her.

“God I just wanna… ugh, you look scared, not of me but of what might happen.”

“Nope, just scared of you”, I rub my ear.

“Liar, you think Margot is gonna take your place.”

“I don’t think, I know… Julie warned me. She told me you play with people’s hearts… then you break them when something better shows up, when someone shows up.”

“How dumb are you?”

“Obviously not that dumb! This whole time you tried to keep me from knowing the truth. Knowing that I’m just… supposed to be Costia. But since I’ve been nothing but trouble you go and find Margot, kick me to the curve.”

“Might as well! It’ll save me the trouble of dealing with you! Now I can see why you’re begged me to take you, you’re just a stupid blonde who relies on others. You should’ve been like every other Omega. A dirty bucket that Alphas came release in! Just a cum bucket!.”

The whole house goes silent. Everyone looks at their hands.

“Just a cum bucket…”, I reach into my hair. “Was that what you used Costia for? Is that why she ran away! Got tired of you using her for your self pleasure as you raped her, over, and over again.”

“Don’t you-”

“No! I’ve listened to your shitty opinion! I heard what you believe”, I take out the hairpin. “This whole time I pretended to be someone I wasn’t!”, I throw the hairpin. The front gets a crack in it. “I let you put my hair in complicated braids, I wore these… shitty outfits! These ugly outfits that I despise, and for what? A false hope? A hope that I can get out of here alive?”, I shake my head. “Do you ever think that maybe Costia wanted to die?”

_ That hit a nerve. _

I watch as it takes all of Lexa’s power to not hit me. 

“Do you really think I love  _ you _ ?”, she looks at me. “I dress you like that to remind me of her! I don’t have any interest in you! I couldn’t care less for you!”

I wait for Lexa to continue.

“You’re just holding her place for now, all you are is a person in her shadow”, she walks over to the hairpin on the floor. Lexa picks it up and walks over to me. “You’re nothing but a placeholder”, she puts the hairpin in. “Understand?”

I nod, my mind somewhere else. “When was Costia’s birthday?”, I whisper the words.

“August 5th… why?”, I hear the click of the hairpin.

I shake my head.

**A chain collar appears on my neck. It clicks as it’s hooked to a chain. I’m pushed forward. My stomach does flips as I fall, a chain net is the only thing that stops me. Before I can react, I’m twisted up in the chains. They hold me down as a fire burns under me. Two green eyes stare at me, a wicked gleam in their eyes. There’s a chuckle as the chains rattle.**

_ Why am I so surprised? She just confirmed what I thought. _

I feel something rising in my stomach, threatening to come out. There’s no time to react as puke flies out of my mouth. I feel my head spinning before everything goes black.


	37. Passcode

********

“Is she ok?”, Margot looks at Clarke.

“She’s fine.”

“She fainted!”

“I’m well aware”, I look down at the blonde. I crouch down, using my thumb to wipe her mouth.

_ She must’ve been sick. _

I sniff the air then my wrist.

_ My pheromones are choking. Maybe she tried to resist it and ended up hurting her head, messing with her stomach, causing her to faint. _

“What’re you gonna do with her?”

I shrug. “Maybe… no that won’t work”, I walk around Clarke. “I’ll have to train her… break her.”

“Break her?”, Margot looks at me.

“You know, scare them into obedience.”

“How?”

I smile. “Fucking.”

“You’re gonna rape her”, Luna glares at me.

“No, I’m gonna get her to trust me, take her virginity, and then hope for the best.”

“After the words you said to her, I doubt she’ll be wanting to fuck you.”

“Probably but don’t worry about it, I got it handled.”

********

“Ugh”, I groan as a headache shakes my brain. Every movement triggers pain.

“You’re awake.”

I freeze at that voice. Looking to my right, I see Lexa. I feel my senses go up, my body now on guard. Sitting up, I look around.

Raven smiles at me. “You feeling ok?”

“Y-yeah”, I rub my head. “What happened?”

“You passed out”, Margot offers me some water.

I eye the glass.

_ What is she trying to do? _

“It’s just water, I promise.”

I take the glass. “Thanks.”

“I had a thought”, Lexa stands up.

Everyone looks at her, patiently waiting for her to continue.

“Clarke, you’ll be sleeping with me tonight. Margot, you can sleep in Clarke’s room. There’s a cat so don’t be alarmed if you hear something moving around.”

Margot nods.

I look away.

_ August 5th… that’s 8/5… what’s the rest? I need to know the year. _

I stand up, my head spinning as I do. “What… what year?”

“Hmm”, Lexa looks at me.

“Costia, how old was she when she died?”

Lexa eyes me. “Why are you so curious about her?”

I shrug.

_ I wish I could tell her I feel like there’s a woman haunting. Waiting for me to solve her case, rest her case and let her move on. It’s like she’s stuck here… waiting, waiting for something… someone. _

“Well?”

I shrug.

“I will tell you this, next month she would’ve 21.”

_ 3010, she was born 3010. So 853010? _

I move over to the couch.

“You’re shaking.”

I grunt in response.

_ It hurts, something hurts. _

“Why don’t you lay on a bed? Rest early.”

I look out the window then at Lexa.

“Trust me, it’s best.”

“Right, cause you would know”, I growl at the brunette. In the end I do decide to take a nap, clear my mind.

********

“What are you gonna do about the blonde? She seems to hate you.”

I shrug.

“You really don’t care about your relationship at all.”

“Ok”, I look at Luna. “What do you want me to do?”

“Fix it!”

“How? Be like ‘hey claarke, I’m sorry I basically said you’re pointless but can we fuck and make up?’?”

“Well… not like that.”

“I’ve got everything handled.”

“Do you?”

July 4th, 3031

********

I wake up to someone whispering my name. Arms loosely wrap around my waist, a light snore sounding behind me.

“Clarke”, someone whispers my name.

I manage to snake out of Lexa’s arm. I leave the room. “Hello?”

A woman turns and starts walking.

“Hey wait”, I chase after the woman. 

She turns and disappears into Lexa’s office.

I look at the keypad. “853010”, I type the number on the keypad. It beeps, a red light flashing.

_ What the hell? _

I test the number again only for it to beep again.

“What could it be?”

“Clarke”, the voice whispers my name again.

“I’m trying to figure it out.”

“Clarke.”

“Shut up”, I hiss at the woman.

“Claaarke.”

_ Clarke! Maybe… maybe my birthday? _

“9103010”, the thing beeps, flashing green. I open the door. “Hello?”, I look around. The woman is gone. I walk over to Lexa’s desk, a box sits on the desk.

“Might as well”, I open the box. I reach in and take out a letter.

**Dear reader,**

**Lexa is getting more violent. She’s very mean when I don’t listen but I don’t know what she wants… I wanna go home.**

I take out another one.

**Dear reader,**

**A man came by, he was looking for me saying Bellamy was looking for me. Lexa got mad, she said the police office could come in. I don’t know where he went but I do know he didn’t leave the house… do you think she killed him?**

**A part of me wants to leave this place but I don't wanna go back to Bellamy, I can't. I have to leave this place.**

“So she wasn't happy with Bellamy?”, I take another letter.

**I’m sorry for the sloppy writing, I’m currently writing. I do hope this letter gets in the box, Mistletoe knows what to do if she finds the letter.**

“Who’s Mistletoe?”

“Mreow”, the white cats jumps onto the office desk.

“So you do have a name”, I pat her head.

**Anyways, I’m running, it’s really dark. I’m running from the one that wants me dead. I guess my plan worked, I am afraid to die but I prepared myself for this. Just… I hope this person owns up to their sins, maybe then I can rest. The person who takes my life is**

The window flies open, the wind taking the note from my hand and sweeping away the letters.

“No!”, I run to the window. “Please, no!”

“Meow?”, Mistletoe jumps onto the window. She nudges my face before jumping out the window.

“What the hell are you doing!”

I turn around. Alpha storms over to me, her hands gripping onto my neck. 

“What makes you think you have the right to search my office!”, she squeezes my neck.

I pull on her hands, hoping to get her to let go. Hoping to get some air.

“Now lets not kill the girl”, a hand grabs onto Lexa’s shoulder. “Don’t do something you’ll regret.”

Lexa lets go.

“You shouldn’t go snooping”, Luna smiles at me.

I nod, my throat hurting as I do.

Lexa looks at me. “Wh-”   
I push past Lexa and run out of the office. I run downstairs and out the house. I search the front yard. “Please, please be here.”

After hours of searching I fall on my knees and scream at the sky. The sun begins to rise, shining on my face. When I look at the forest, I see a woman in a white dress. She has tears running down her face, the look of disappointment on her face. She turns and walks away.

I look at my hands. I hear the front door open. When I look over my shoulder, I see Lexa. She looks at the ground. With a sigh, I stand up. I head towards the door.

Lexa grabs my hand. “I’m… I’m sorry about earlier.”

I pull my hand away, pushing past her I head inside.

“Who wants dessert?”, Aya sings the words as she puts a cake on the table.

“I want a slice of that”, Raven smiles.

“I don’t know if you deserve a piece”, Luna glances at Raven’s plate. The vegetables still on it. 

“Aww, I’ll eat them later.”

“No you won’t”, Luna smiles at Raven. “You can have a slice… between you and me, I don’t eat vegetables either”, Luna winks at Raven.

_ Why do they have such a good relationship? _

“Clarke? You want a slice?”

“Is there a tiny one?”

“No such things as a tiny slice of cake”, Aya eyes me. “Sickening.”

“But.. I don’t want too much.”

“Give it to Lexa if you don’t want the rest.”

Halfway through eating, Lexa stands up. She leans over, her tongue making contact with my cheek.

_ Is she licking me?! _

I don’t have time to react as she pushes her tongue in my mouth. Her kiss ruining my appetite.

She moves down, laying a kiss on my neck before freezing. “Wait”, she tilts my chin up and moves my head so my neck is showing more. She sniffs my neck, a growl escaping her mouth. “Are… are you in heat?”, she leans back, looking at me.

Everyone freezes.

“I didn’t smell anything”, Aya shrugs.

“Same”, Raven looks at me.

Luna sniffs my wrist. “It’s there.”

“No wonder you attacked Margot”, Lexa smiles. “Someone getting too close to your Alpha?”

“Don’t flatter yourself.”

“Hey”, Lexa walks around the table, sitting on it by my plate. “I would be nice to me.”

“Why?”

“In a day, you’ll start feeling hot… the heat will start here”, she lays a finger on my chest. “It’ll move up”, she moves her finger up my neck. “Messing with your head and vision… then it’ll go down”, her hand starts moving down my stomach. “And down”, she smirks when she meets my gaze. Her hand stopping.

“And down?”, I tilt my head.

“Yes…”, Lexa plays with the button on my pants, she undoes it. “All the way too here”, Her hand slips in.

I feel myself tense up, my face heating up and turning red.

“Guys! We’re eating”, Luna glares at us.

“I was just telling her!”, Lexa removes her hand. The tip of her fingers wet. Lexa pops one in her mouth.

“I’m going upstairs”, I stand up and head towards the stairs.

“Call me if you need anything.”

I hold up my middle finger before heading up the stairs.

_ Heat? I can’t be in heat? I’ve never been in heat. _


	38. Heat

July 6th, 3031

“It’s only been two days and you’re already feeling it down there?”

“Fuck off!”, I glare at Lexa.

“Hey, I’m just saying. I could easily help you.”

“Don’t touch me”, I move away from her. “And get out of my room.”

“Are you hiding away in here to stay away from the Alphas or keep your pheromones away from everyone? Cause everyone can smell your heat, your basically begging to be fucked... the pheromones are strong.”

“You’re not helping”, I hug my knees. “I… I’ve never been in heat.”

“I can tell”, Lexa eyes me. “I mean look at yourself.”

My anger boils back to the top. “Why are you here?”

“Glad you asked”, Lexa smiles.

I look at her, my heat making me shake.

“You see… I’m in rut, and I haven’t fucked-”

“Do you have to call it that?”

“Sorry, had sex… in I wanna say 2 days.”

“What happens in rut?”

Lexa closes the door behind her. “I can show you.”

I feel a blast of pheromones hit me.

“Wanna see?”

“Uh…”, my eyes go down Lexa’s body, stopping at her groin. I point at her groin. “That?”

“Do you wanna see… that?”, Lexa gets closer to me. Walking slowly and taking tiny steps.

“Yes”, I nod. I press my legs together.

“Desperate much”, Lexa pushes me back on the bed.

I move to sit up but Lexa climbs onto me, sitting down on my stomach.

“Hmm… do these affect you?”

I’m about to ask ‘what’ but then a wave of pheromones hits me. Out of instinct I bring my hand to my nose, trying to cover my nose.

Lexa peels my hand off my nose, holding my hands at the side of my body.

“How do they affect you?”

“Please.”

“Please what?”

“I… I don’t know.”

“What do you want?”

“That… I want that.”

Lexa smirks leaning forward she kisses me. “I”, she kisses my cheek. “Love”, the sound of tearing sounds through the air. Cold air hits my chest. “You”, Lexa moves down my body, her tongue moving down my stomach. She looks up at me through hooded eyes. “Where’s it hurt?”

“The… the heat?”

“Yes”, Lexa kisses my stomach, her tongue licking my belly button. “Higher or lower?”

“L-lower.”

“May I?”, Lexa grabs onto my pants. When I don’t respond she moves to the side, taking off my pants. “Cute panties.”

Bringing my hands up, I cover my face. “Don’t make fun of me.”

“I would never”, Lexa laughs. She kisses my panty line.

“Why so slow?”

“Trust me, you may want it now but… you’re still a virgin, this is your first time feeling pleasure.”

I stare at her. “Pleasure?”

“This”, Lexa licks between my legs.

I tense up, a shock running up my body.

“See?”

“But I liked it”, I sit up, lightly pushing Lexa off. I push her back against the bed. “You know… I was always told females could grow a… thing.”

Lexa stares up at me. “And?”, she pushes my ripped shirt off.

“I wanna see, I wanna see it”, I push Lexa’s shirt up, my hand pulling down on her bra.

“Well it’s not on my boobs”, Lexa laughs.

“I know”, I lean forward. My lips making contact with her nipple.

********

“What do you think they’re doing? Is Clarke gonna be a virgin?”

“Probably not anymore… not after this.”

I look upstairs. “I thought Lexa didn’t want to take her innocence.”

“She’s horny”, Luna smiles. “Really horny.”

********

I stare up at Lexa, her body frozen above mine.

“Are… are you sure about this?”

“Sex?”

“Letting me take your virginity.”

“Someone has to.”

Lexa kisses me, her hips grinding into mine.

My whole body tenses up when a pain shoots through my body. My nails dig into Lexa. 

I feel Lexa deepen the kiss. She leans back a few seconds later. “You ok?”

“It… it hurts.”

Lexa starts pulling out. I close my legs. “No, anything but that… please?”

“You better tell me if anything hurts.”

I nod, “I will.”

(I don’t know how many minutes, hours or whatever it is. I’m just not one to write sex scnese… sorry)

I roll my over, my back facing her.

Lexa hugs her knees, her head resting on them. “Feeling ok?”

“Eh”, I shrug.

“Right… sorry if it hurt.”

“Did”, I turn and face her. “Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“That… that you loved me.”

“I wonder”, Lexa looks in front of her.

_ Why do I feel disappointed? _

“Thank you for helping me”, I climb off the bed. “I’ll be heading back to my room.”

Getting on my knees, I start searching for my clothes. Looking at my underwear, I notice how wet they are. “Great”, I drop them instead grabbing my pants. I quickly put them on before standing up.

“Here”, Lexa holds out a bra. “I’ll have someone wash the rest of your clothes.”

“Thanks”, I clip on my bra and quickly leave the room.

“I see it went well”, Raven smiles at me.

“Is that sarcasm?”

“Is it that easy to tell?”, she shakes her head telling me not to answer. “You know, you seem like the type that would moan during everything… but it was quiet up here.”

I shrug. “I was biting things.”

Raven smirks. “Lexa’s thing?”

“What?! No!”

Lexa’s door flies open. “Fuck off Raven”, Lexa wraps an arm around my waist, pulling me into her room. “Stupid Beta”, Lexa shakes her head.

“Why did you drag me here?”

Lexa looks at me. “I don’t know”, she walks around and goes to the window. “It’s still sunny outside… wanna do something?”

“Not really.”

“C’mon, it’ll be fun. We can go wherever you want.”

“No.”

Lexa bites her bottom lip. “I won’t let anyone take you”, she walks over to me. “I promise.”

I move away from her hand, “I don’t wanna go outside. What do you not understand?”

“You can’t hide away forever”, Lexa retracts her hand. “Stay here, I’ll get some clothes.”

I watch Lexa leave the room. When she comes back, she has some clothes. 

“I got ripped jeans, a white shirt… well more like a belly shirt, a plaid shirt jacket, and black knee boats”, Lexa hands me the clothes.

“I don’t wanna go”, I look down at the white shirt, my finger picking at it. “Please don’t make me go.”

“You can’t hide away forever”, Lexa sits on her bed. “Now get dressed.”

I look at Lexa.

_ When did she change clothes? _

I start heading towards the bathroom.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m going to change”, I look at her.

“I don't trust you alone, just change here.”

Once I’m dressed, Lexa leads me downstairs.

“Why do I have to go? I can stay here”, I put on the boots.

“We already talked about this”, Lexa opens the door. “After you love.”

“Good luck!”, Raven yells from the living room.

“We’ll be back in an hour!”, Lexa hits my butt then closes the door.


	39. Note

Due to school, I probably won't update until Friday. I may update Wednesday next week too... sorry. I only have 2 new chapters, I'd rather have 3 or 4 to update.


	40. note

I'mma admit, I'm a little worried about the next chapters...

**It’s gonna seem like everything is wrapping up, which it is. So sorry if everything seems rushed, I tried my best to make it not seem like that. Sorry for the long wait, I was gonna post the 3 chapters but I realized, might as well wrap everything up. Once I post a few chapters, I kinda wanna stop writing for the day but when I don’t publish the chapters Im’ working on, I wanna keep going. But I’m not gonna publish the whole ending… sorry. At least not yet.**


	41. Chapter 41

“We’ll be walking so no car”, Lexa walks ahead of me.  
I stand on the porch, my eyes scanning everywhere.  
“C’mon, don’t wanna get lost now do ya?”  
“Wait for me”, I run over to Lexa. We walk out of the gates of the house. A woman with a dog passes by. Her dog stops walking and sniffs me.  
“Sorry”, the woman pulls her dog away and they continue on their way.  
“Jesus, are you scared of dogs now?”  
I don’t respond. I find myself feeling ashamed of being scared of a dog. I look at the ground, watching a piece of hair swing.  
“We’re here.”  
I bump into Alpha.  
She grunts as a response, her eyes running over my body before looking away.  
“Sorry”, I look at the building. “A… cafe?”  
“Figured you would want something to eat.”  
“I’m not hungry though.”  
“There’s always space for ice cream”, Alpha heads into the building.  
Sighing I follow her in.  
“One chocolate long john and…”, Alpha looks at me.  
“I’ll take vanilla ice cream.”  
“Long john and vanilla ice cream coming right up”, the woman nods and heads into the kitchen.  
“So… are you actually afraid of dogs?”, Alpha looks at me.  
“It was a big dog.”  
“Quite sad”, she shakes her head.  
I look away. My fingers run along the edge of the table.  
“You always look so sad”, I feel a finger on my hand.  
“I just… I was just thinking.”  
“So you’re always thinking?”  
I shake my head.  
“Don’t tell me you’re scared of me”, Lexa leans forward.  
I look around the cafe, hoping to avoid eye contact.  
Lexa grabs my chin, forcing me to look at her. “I’ve kissed you a million times, bathed with you, watched you change, I even stuffed my dick in you… yet you are still scared?”  
“I-I’m sorry.”  
“It’s fine”, Lexa puts money on the table. “Thanks love”, she smiles at the woman who hands us our food.  
The woman blushes and nods.  
“Shall we go?”  
I follow Lexa out of the Cafe. We take a right instead of left. I feel myself stop walking when we pass by an animal shop. Without telling Lexa, I head into the shop.  
“Welcome”, a man smiles at me.  
I smile back and look at the animals.  
“Arf.”  
Looking down, I see the fluffiest puppy ever. It sits at my feet, its black eyes staring up at me.  
“Clarke?!”  
“Look, isn’t she cute?”, I crouch down and pet the dog.  
“Yes, she’s cute, now lets leave”, Lexa grabs my hand.  
“I want her”, I try to pull my hand away.  
“You’re not getting a dog.”  
I’m dragged out of the animal shop. “Why not?”  
“Cause.”  
“But she was cute!”  
“I don’t care!”  
The rest of the walk is silent. Every now and then Lexa will say something, hoping to get me to talk.  
********  
“Clarke, I’ll get you anything. Anything but that”, Lexa walks into the house.  
“I want the dog”, Clarke pushes past Lexa.  
“But you’re not getting a dog.”  
“Hmph!”, Clarke flops onto the couch.  
“Luna, you had a dog, tell the woman it’s hard work.”  
“A dog is hard work”, I look up. “But they become your best friend on the first day, and you have many precious moments together.”  
“I want a dog!”, Clarke glares at Lexa.  
Lexa pinches the bridge of her nose. “Clarke”, she looks at the blonde. “I’ll buy you anything but a dog.”  
“What would you buy me?”  
“I don’t fucking know!”, Lexa leans against a wall. “I could buy you a care?”  
Clarke shakes her head.  
“House?”  
“Nope.”  
“Freedom.”  
“No!”  
“I could buy you a country, two countriees, I’d even buy a million cats! In fact the whole fucking planet! Just please, not a dog!”  
“Why cats but not dogs?”  
“Cats are destined to run away.”  
“I. Want. A. Dog!”  
Alpha sighs, her head shaking. “I’m not getting you a dog”, she glares at me.  
“Why would you buy me a planet but not a dog?”  
Alpha shrugs.  
“Right…”, I turn and head upstairs. I sit on Alpha’s bed, my feet hanging.  
“Mreow”, the white cat jumps onto the bed. Her tail wrapping around her feet.  
“Hello there”, I notice a piece of paper in her mouth. “What’s that?”  
The white cat drops the papers.  
Grabbing it I read what it says. 

I’ve always been a fan of stars and planets, Alpha said when I turn 22 she’ll get me a planet, she promised but we both know she won’t be able to keep it…  
Costia

“That’s why she would buy me a planet”, I crumple the paper and fall back onto the bed. “All her decisions are based off Costia”, I grab a pillow and push it into my face. I scream into the pillow.  
The pillow is taken off my face. Looking up I see Lexa.  
“You’re crying”, she brushes tears off my face. She sits by me, her finger running down my neck. “I heard you screaming.”  
“Sorry.”  
“It’s fine… you seem angry, tense. Do you cry when mad?”, Alpha’s hand spreads out on my stomach.  
“I don’t know.”  
“Sorry”, Alpha leans forward. Her lips gently pressing against mine.  
A shiver runs up my spine when her hand goes under my shirt. Breaking the kiss I notice a bump in Alpha’s pants.  
“I thought you were done with your rut.”  
“Doesn’t mean I can’t be turned on.”  
Reaching up, I wrap my arms around her neck. I pull her down, bringing our lips together.  
I wake up to Alpha twitching.  
“No”, fear crosses her face though her eyes are still closed.  
A nightmare?  
“It wasn’t my fault”, she twitches again, this time almost hitting me. “She made me do it, she made me.”  
She?  
“Wouldn’t listen… why wouldn’t she listen?”, sadness crosses Alpha’s face. “Night, field… perfect”, she goes still. Her breathing slowly slowing.  
Is this about Costia?  
“Bottle, shatter, bang.”  
My eyes widen.   
She shot Costia?!  
“Hide, had to hide… I’m so sorry”, a tear rolls down Alpha’s face.  
With a shaking hand, I cover my mouth.  
Aya was right…  
I feel like I’m gonna puke. Scrambling off the bed, I run out of the bedroom.


	42. Chapter 42

July 7th, 3031  
My eyes fly open when I feel a hand on my back. It runs over my back then back down. I look over my shoulder, relaxing when I see Aya.  
“Your wolf is so fluffy”, Aya smiles down at me.  
Yawning I stand up, fur clings to the couch.  
“I’ll clean that later, we all just had breakfast. There’s some leftovers if you want to eat.”  
Turning back to a human, I head towards the kitchen. I stop when I see Lexa.  
She runs a finger around the rim of her glass, seeming not to notice me.  
I have to ask her about her sleep talking… see if what she said was the truth.  
I shake my head deciding eating is way better than having that… talk.  
“Here.”  
I look at Alpha, she holds out a shirt.  
“You’re shivering, I figured having a shirt on would help.”  
“Thanks”, I take the shirt and put it on. It goes down to my knees. I find that my appetite is gone so I head to the living room and sit on the couch.  
“You look nervous”, Raven smiles at me.  
I shrug. “I don’t know what I’m feeling.”  
“That must suck… wanna talk about it?”   
I shake my head. “Not really.”  
“It involves me, doesn’t it?”  
I freeze at Alpha’s voice.  
“It probably does”, Raven stands up. She leaves the living room.  
Alpha sits by me. “Well?”  
I don’t respond, my eyes focused on my hands.  
“You have to tell me.”  
“Do… do you talk in your sleep?”  
“Is that what was bugging you?”  
“Answer the question”, my voice comes out angry. When I look at Lexa, she seems confused.  
“I’ve been told that sometimes I will… only during a nightmare though.”  
“Did… did you have a nightmare last night?”  
“Nope”, Alpha is quick to respond.  
“Are you sure?”  
Alpha nods. “Is that all?”  
She’s not gonna tell me, is she?  
“It wasn’t my fault”, I recite one of the words she said.  
Alpha doesn’t respond, she just looks at me.  
“She made me do it, she made me”, I say another sentence.  
“What are y-”  
“Wouldn’t listen… why wouldn’t she listen?”  
“Clarke.”  
“Night, field… perfect”, I notice Alpha’s finger picking at the couch.  
“Bottle, shatter, bang.”  
“Stop.”  
“Hide, had to hide.”  
“Clarke stop.”  
“I’m so sor-”  
Lexa slpas me cutting me off.  
Everyone in the kitchen looks at us.  
It takes Lexa a few seconds to realize what she did. “Clarke”, she reaches out.  
“Don’t!”, I move away.  
“I…”  
“No wonder Costia left… she made you mad so you killed her.”  
“No, I-”  
“Admit it!”, I snap at Lexa. “You killed Costiaa cause she wouldn’t submit!”  
“I’m so sorry”, Lexa looks down. “I didn’t mean to.”  
A few tears fall onto the couch. The few tears turn into a lot.  
“I… I don’t know why I did it.”  
“So you did kill Costia?”  
Lexa nods. “Yes…”  
“Then you hid the body, told everyone a lie.”  
Lexa shakes her head but says ‘yes’.   
“You murdered the one person that loved you! All for what? Power?”, I move further away. “You weren’t even drunk.. were you?”  
Lexa breaks down crying, her body shaking.  
I ignore her cries for forgiveness and her saying she’s sorry. Crossing my legs, I rest my head in my hand. I look out the window, a woman in a white dress is smiling. Tears slowly roll down her face, the faint outline of a cat rubs against her legs.  
The window flies open, the wind whistling as it blows in the house. “Thank you”, the wind whispers in my ear.  
A smile spreads across my face. When I look back out the window, the woman is walking away. Her figure slowly disappears as she goes into the forest.  
Now that I solved that case...  
I look at Lexa.  
Did she cry herself to sleep?  
Leaning forward I move her hair. “I’m sorry”, I kiss the side of her head before standing up.  
It’s not even that late and I feel exhausted.  
I stretch my arms. “I’m going to get some fresh air”, I look at the people in the kitchen.   
Luna nods, her eyes on the couch. She has a blank look in her eyes, almost like she’s troubled.  
Looking at everyone else, I see they all have the same look. A look of fear.  
Are they afraid of me?  
Shaking my head, I turn around and head outside. The cold air hits my face and arms, sending chills up me. I sit on the doorstep, my head in my hand.  
A blanket is wrapped around me keeping the cold air out.  
“You were shivering”, Raven sits by me.  
I keep my eyes on my hands, hoping she doesn’t notice.  
“But you’re not shivering cause of the cold… why are you crying?”  
“I don’t know.”  
“Does it have something to do with Lexa, do you feel bad?”  
“I don’t know!”, the tears come pouring out. “I shouldn’t be crying, I shouldn’t feel bad… but I do.”  
“That’s just you, you’re a naturally good person.”  
“I’m crying for a murderer.”  
Raven looks down. “Maybe you're crying cause you feel bad, but because you realize something.”  
I look at Raven.  
Realized something?  
********  
I look down at Lexa. She lies on the couch, her wolf out and whimpering every now and then.  
“You finally admitted”, I try to start a conversation.  
Lexa grunts, pushing her snout into a pillow.  
“Well… what’re you gonna do?”  
Lexa looks up at me.  
“The blonde hates you, I don't think she’ll ever like you again.”  
Lexa looks away, her eyes staring out the window. She suddenly sits up, her ears up and listening. A look of sadness crosses her face, her ears drop as she lays back down.  
“I don’t think you can fix this.”


	43. Chapter 43

July 8th, 3031  
********  
I start walking down the stairs, the smell of food guiding my feet.  
“Why do you care so much?”  
I freeze at the sound of Lexa’s voice. She doesn’t sound too happy.  
“I just don’t think you’re making the right choice for her.”  
There’s Luna’s voice. Are they arguing?  
“You’ve said that the last times.”  
“No, I warned you the last time so you wouldn’t have to deal with the painful climax, outcome, of this situation.”  
“I got everything handled”, Lexa sounds more annoyed now.  
“Do you? Do you think keeping her here even though she hates this place, will do you any good? Do any of us any good? She’s gonna end up like Costia.”  
The sound of a glass shattering fills the house.  
“Don’t you talk about Costia like you knew her!”  
“Maybe I knew her more than you did.”  
There’s a sigh. “What do you want from me Luna?”  
“I want you to let her go, let her do her own thing.”  
“She’s allowed outside.”  
“No, I mean let her go. Set her free, give her the wish she always wanted granted.”  
Are they talking about me?  
I step out from behind the wall, all eyes go to me. I look down, my feet kicking at nothing.  
“How long were you there?”  
“Are… are you guys arguing about me?”, I look at Lexa.  
She shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter.”  
“It did a minute ago.”  
“That was a minute ago, this is now.”  
“Why won’t you tell me?”, I step towards her. “I’m older than you think… in fact I’m only 2 years younger than you.”  
Lexa eyes me. “Just forget about it.”  
I step back, “you don’t tell me anything.”  
Lexa doesn’t respond.  
“It’s like you don’t trust me, which I can understand that, but if you’re arguing about me… then don’t I deserve to know?”  
“Who knows”, Lexa shrugs.  
I feel anger boil up inside me. My eyes pace back and forth, wanting to tear Lexa apart but it also keeps a distance. It knows it won’t be able to win. “I hate you!”, I turn and run out of the kitchen. My feet carry me out of the house only stopping by the road. Crouching down I stare at the city.  
The school bells goes off.  
I should be there.  
“I wanna go home”, I hug my legs. “Why can’t I go home?”, I ask the person behind me.  
There’s no response. I hear them walking towards me, only stopping a few inches behind me.  
We both stay silent, neither of saying anything. Yet it’s like we’re thinking the same thing, like we’re one person.  
********  
Silently, I knock on the door. I try not to wake Clarke, her body limp in my arms. The door opens.  
“Does she naturally fall asleep?”, Aya looks at Clarke.  
“I think the sound of nature made her tired”, I walk into the house.  
Raven scoots over on the couch allowing me to set Clarke by her.  
“I’m going to my office”, I turn and head upstairs. When I walk into my office, I spot Luna.  
“She ran out saying she hated you”, Luna stands up. “Is that not enough proof?”  
“I get it, I have to let her go”, I lean on my desk. “I just… I don’t wanna.”  
“I know, no one wants to let go but… sometimes you have to.”  
I stare at the picture on my desk.  
“Who knows… maybe she’ll come back”, Luna leaves my office.  
Why does she always know what to say?  
When I look out the window, I notice the sun setting.   
How long have I been sitting up here?  
I stare at a pink cherry blossom hair clip.  
I shake my head and go downstairs. Walking into the living room, my eyes go straight Luna. She only looks at me. Sighing I know what I have to do.  
“Clarke, c’mere”, I look at the blonde.  
Clarke looks at me, she seems hesitant but she stands up and walks over to me. “Yeah?”  
I eye her. She looks like Costia exactly, minus the red hair. Though Clarke has the freckles that perfect her. I reach for the hairpin but my hand freezes.  
You have to do this, Clarke isn’t Costia. You don’t love Costia… you love Clarke.  
I unclip the hairpin then smooth out her hair. My thumb gently brushes her cheek before my hand goes to her chin. Being gentle I tilt her head up, laying a kiss on her lips.  
She’s missing something.  
Looking around I search my pockets. I find the blue cherry blossom hairpin and a pink cherry blossoms. “Here”, I clip the pink cherry blossom into her hair. Leaning forward I whisper, “Now you’re your own person”, I lay a kiss on her cheek.  
Clarke looks up at me, her head tilted.  
I smile. “Don’t be so cute, I’mma cry.”  
“I’ll take her home”, I glance at Luna.  
Clarke looks at the front door then back at me. “Home?”  
“Yeah, your mom is waiting.”  
The ride to her house is silent. Not because it’s awkward but because Clarke is amazed by everything outside the window.  
I stop outside her outside. “We’re here”, I look at the blonde.  
She stares at her house before looking at me. “Why?”  
I shrug.  
Clarke leans over, her arms wrapping around me. “Thank you.”  
“I didn’t do anything.”  
“You did a lot more than you think”, she sits back, a smile on her face. “Well… goodbye Alexandria Woods.”


	44. Chapter 44

********

I walk through the front door, the house feels rather cold and empty. When I walk into the kitchen, I spot Luna sitting at the counter. She stares at a bottle of wine.

“You ok?”, I walk over to her.

“Yeah, yeah… I’m fine”, she looks at me. “You?”

I shrug and sit by her.

“Did the Blondie make it home?”

“Yep, her mom ran out and greeted her.”

“That’s good”, Luna pushes the bottle away. “She was happy right?”

“Seemed to be”, I reach out and grab the wine. “I should be happy that she’s happy… right?”, I look at the bottle.

“Normally that’s how it works.”

“Then…”, I wipe away a tear. “Why am I so sad?”

Luna doesn’t respond, instead she reaches out and brings my head to her shoulder. “Maybe you weren’t ready to say goodbye.”

I turn my head into Luna’s neck, the tears slowly rolling down my face. “I miss her.”

“Costia?”, Luna’s fingers run through my hair.

“No, I miss Clarke… I miss the Blondie.”

********

“Why don’t you go upstairs, settle back in?”

I nod. I find myself hesitating as I head upstairs, my room door is closed. When I open it, old memories seem to fly at me.

Walking in, I kick off my shoes. My eyes go straight to the C over my bed, lights hanging off it.

(I don’t know how many years ago… when Clarke was 5)

“Clarke”, my door opens. “Dad has a surprise for you.”

“Where?”, I look up at mom.

“Kitchen, you go. I’ll pick up the blocks.”

“Thanks”, I run past mom and head to the kitchen. “Daddy!”, I run and hug Dad. 

“Hey duck”, dad crouches down. “I got you something.

“Mom said you did… where is it?”

Dad pulls something out from behind is back. “For you to decorate your new room.”

I take the wood letter. “A… u?”, I tilt the letter.

Dad laughs, shaking his head he tilts the letter. “A C, for my little Clarke”, he ruffles up my hair.

I stare down at the letter. “I’mma hang this above my bed”, I smile up at dad. 

(Present day)

_ Why’d you have to leave? _

I lean against my door, my eyes staring at a picture on my desk. “You promised”, I walk over to my desk. I lay the picture down on its face and look at my bed. A book sits on the pillow, a look holding it shut.

_ Mom must’ve laid that out for me. _

I sit on my bed. “I forgot about this old thing”, I grab the book, the dust sticking to my fingers. I blow it off and look for the key, I find it taped to the back of the book.

When I open the book, a pencil falls out. I read the last thing I wrote here.

**“I… today marks the first day I had to wake up without the smell of pancakes. The usual country music playing downstairs. Breakfast was quiet, mom left the table early… tears overflowing her face. The house doesn’t seem as bright… weird thing is that dad was always gone doing things but now that I know he’s not returning… it seems dull.**

**(Next day)**

**His stuff is still lying around, mom refuses to do something with it. I’ve been cleaning, putting things in a box. He came by earlier, said he needed some files. I wanted to talk to him, beg him to take me with him but… instead I sat on the stairs. Margot sat by me, her head on my lap. Before he left, he crouched down and started saying something but mom cut him off. They started fighting and yelling. Mom yelled for him to leave, before he left he told me ‘I'll come back for you’... then he was gone.”**

I shake my head. “Yet he never returned”, I grab the pencil.

_ Might as well write in this shitty thing. _

**“Hey… it’s Clarke. I know it’s been years since I last wrote in this… this diary, I suppose it is.”**

I shake my head. “I can’t believe I’m actually doing this.”

**“I’ve been staying at Lexa’s, she bought me. I wasn’t there long, only a few weeks… those weeks managed to have a years worth of stuff happen. It was an endless chapter book… or so I thought. I don’t even know where to begin I guess I’ll start with the friends I made.”**

I look up from the diary. I remember a picture in my pocket when I take it out I notice it’s the picture for Aya’s birthday. Everyone was smiling and happy… for once.

**“I’ll start with Aya, she was like a little sister. Once I never got. She was playful and always had a smile on her face… innocent and pure. Sometimes I found it hard to believe she was older than me.”**

(A week ago)

“What? You’re older?!”, I stare at Aya.

“Yep, I’m actually older than Julie… and most of the other maids.”

“but you’re so.. immature and innocent looking, your breasts haven't’ developed.”

“Hmph!”, Aya crosses her arms. “I’m just waiting for them to develop, sheesh”, she grabs a mop. ‘Anyways, let’s get to cleaning before I beat you with a mop.”

(present moment)

Smiling I shake my head at the memory.

**“God, I could write an essay on Aya… then I suppose there’s julie. Not much to say about her, I do, however, wonder if she’s finally found love. That seemed to be her number one struggle.”**

I stare at my paper.

_ I’ve written about everyone… everyone but Lexa. _

**“Then there’s Pro-Alpha. Let me tell you, she’s more than a spoonful of sugar. She’s probably not a spoonful of sugar, more like a spoonful of an unknown thing. When you meet her, it’s like you’re looking at your favorite cake. Looks perfect on the outside but then you cut it, you eat it and realize the flavoring isn’t right. It’s like… when someone puts black frosting on your cake. Now, most would get mad but you think… it’s my favorite cake. So either get mad at the frosting and ruin the cake… or continue and eat around the frosting. Anyways so you eat around the frosting then you realize that the sweet cake is gone… all but the frosting. So you eat the frosting and fall into a trance like state. One you don’t want to leave and miss when it’s gone and there’s nothing you can do to get it back.”**

Sighing I rub my eyes and wipe the tears.

**“I guess what I’m saying is that… that I never planned on falling in love...”**

I break out crying, my tears staining the paper. My hands shake as I mentally scream at myself for leaving. With shaky hands I manage to write.

**“But not every love ‘story’ has a happy ending.”**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys, I know it's not much


	45. Chapter 45

Two months later so September 8th, 3031

“Ugh”, I walk into the house my feet aching. “I can’t keep doing this”, I take off my shoes and start rubbing my feet.

“Oh honey”, mom lightly taps my shoulder. “I told you to stop working. I can support you.”

“It’s fine mom, I got everything handled”, I smile at her and turn to head upstairs.

_ I can’t live with my mom forever. _

Once I’m in my room I put the tips in a jar. “Another jar full”, I smile.

I feel my eyes close as soon as my head hits the pillow.

“Clarke!”, mom yells my name from downstairs.

_ I just sat down… or did I? _

Groaning I roll over in bed trying to convince myself to get out of bed. Instead of getting out of bed, my eyes close again.

“Clarke Griffin! Get your p-”

“I get it Mom!”, I roll out of bed, landing on my stomach. Once I am out of bed, I head downstairs, my feet aching from working. “Yeah?”

“Someone left a bunch of flowers on the doorstep, there’s a note.”

“Does it say who it is from?”

“Nope”, mom hands me the flowers. “Glad to see you out of bed”, she lightly pats my stomach. 

Ignoring her comment, I set the flowers on the table and look at the note.

**“Hey Clarke, I wanna meet up at the Cafe. You’ll recognize me when you see me.”**

I stare at the note, my eyes re-reading it.

_ Go to the Cafe? _

I groan about the idea of having to walk. “Do I have to go? Like walk?”, I whisper the words to myself.

“What is that?”, mom glances at me. “You need something?”

“Nothing”, I shake my head. “I have to go somewhere”, I quickly slip on a pair of shoes and leave the house.

_ I wonder who is wanting to talk to me? I honestly don’t care, I just need to get out of the house… I’ve been on house lock ever sinc- _

“Hey”, someone lightly taps my shoulder. “I’m right here.”

Looking around, I realize I'm already at the Cafe.

_ Got lost in my thoughts again. _

Looking to my left I see Luna. She smiles at me.

“God, I’ve missed you”, her arms wrap around me. She pushes me back at arms length. “You look so pretty.”

“Right… thanks, you look good too… also happy”, I smile at her. “How are things with you and Raven?”

“Fine, we’re great. She’s been spending time down at the beach and studying marine life”, Luna’s eyes light up when she talks about Raven. “What about you?”, she leads me into the cafe.

We both sit at a booth.

“Tell me about yourself, I wanna know how you’ve been doing.”

“Fine”, I look at the utensils. “Yeah, fine”, I hope to reassure myself with those words. Those empty words.

“Liar”, Luna narrows her eyes.

_ I forgot she hates to be lied to. _

“Something is bugging you.”

I shake my head. “It’s nothing…”, I look up at her. “Why did you come here?”, I’m quick to change the subject.

“Oh, I wanted to talk to you about something… figured I should tell you since she won't”, Luna leans back.

“She? Who is she?”

“Well, she is Lexa”, Luna eyes me before continuing. “She, Lexa, is leaving for a flight. Somewhere in China.”

My eyes widen as the words she said sink in. “W-why is she going?”

“Said she needed a change of scenery, probably going to fuck a few chinese people. I actually believe she’s going to see what chinese sex is”, Luna smiles. “But it’s whatever.”

“Right…”

“Anyways, I should go”, Luna stands up. She stares at me, kinda like she has something to say. “Congrats.”

I tilt my head.

“On the baby, congrats.”

_ How... the hell. _

“Your hand kept covering your stomach, you squeezed your stomach when Lexa’s name was said.”

“Right… I do it unconsciously now.”

“Don’t worry, I won't tell Lexa. If I do she’ll force her way into your life.”

“Thanks.”

Luna nods and leaves the Cafe. Once she’s gone I look at my stomach.

_ What am I gonna do? _

“Hey, how’d it go?”, mom smiles at me as she cleans the counter.

“Fine, I met up with Luna", I reach for soda.

“What did she want to talk about?”, mom grabs the soda.

“Nothing too important", I'm handed a glass of water.

“Did you hear about Lexa?”

“Yeah, she’s going to China.”

“Stupid bitch”, mom shakes her head. “Won’t even be part of her kid's life.”

“In her defence, she doesn’t even know.”

“You can’t raise a kid on your own”, mom looks at me.

“I know, I know. Can I sleep on it?”

Mom nods. “Of course.”

********

“Are you at the airport?”

“Yes”, I move the phone to my other shoulder. “Now I’m just waiting.”

“Great, hope you have a nice trip.”

“Wish you were coming… I’mma get lonely without you.”

“I’m surprised you’re admitting that”, Luna chuckles. “But I have a feeling that loneliness won’t be a problem.”

“What’s that mean?”

“Anyways”, Luna ignores my question. “If you ever need to visit, Raven and I will be down in Hawaii.”

“Why Hawaii again?”

“Raven wants to study the animals there.”

“I thought you hated Hawaii”, I look around. 

_ Why am I looking around? What am I looking for? _

I find myself laughing at the question. 

_ You know why you’re looking around, you know who you’re looking for. _

“I just want her to be happy”, Luna breaks my thoughts.

“Make sure you keep her happy.”

“Oh I will… and uh, make sure you keep her happy.”

“Who?”

“You’ll see and before you call me in like tomorrow, you know how to do it. You got everything handled.”

“What are you t-”

The phone beeps since Luna hung up on me.

_ Now what? _

The woman announces my flight. Shaking my head I stand up.

_ I wonder what Clarke is doing… is she looking up at the night sky or sleeping? _

A woman in the distance yells about something.

I step into line waiting for me to board the plane.

“Lexa!”

I feel someone grab my wrist. At first I pull away but catch a glimpse of blonde hair. I step out of line.

“What the hell!”, I look at the person.

Clarke looks up at me, her eyes red and puffy.

“Clarke? Are you ok? Why are you here? How did you find me?”

“I… I came to get you. Don’t leave”, Clarke tugs on my arm. “Or take me with you.”

“W-why?”

“I don’t know yet, I just… when I heard you were leaving I felt crushed.  _ We _ felt crushed.”

“We?”

“I… I love you Alexandria”, Clarke stands on her toes. Her lips gently touching mine.

_ China or Clarke? _

I gently grab Clarke’s wrist and look around. I head to the bathroom dragging Clarke in.

********

Lexa pushes me against the bathroom wall, her lips smashing against mine.

“Mpha”, I move my head, breaking the kiss.

Lexa looks at me.

“Here?”

She nods.

“In a public restroom?”

She nods again.

“Where people can walk in on us?”

Lexa lowers her hands, they rest on my waist.

“W-what if someone walks in? Sees me naked?”

Lexa’s smile turns into annoyance. “Ya done?”

“B-but… I don’t w-”

Lexa’s lips smash against mine, her tongue forcing its way into my mouth.

I grab onto her shoulders, a feeling of electricity running through me.


	46. Chapter 46

This is gonna be the wrap up chapter, sorry for all the skips and all that.

I stare at myself in the reflection, my eyes are no longer red and puffy but my hair is a mess.

“You look hot”, Lexa walks into the bathroom, her body naked and bare.

“We’re all those positions necessary?”

“Hey, it brought you to an orgasm did it not?”

Sighing I shake my head and splash water on my face.

“You still tired?”, Lexa’s arms wrap around my waist.

A low growl escapes my mouth.

“Hey”, Lexa takes her arms off me. “You ok? Did I hurt you?”

“N-no… sorry. Can we talk about it later?”

“Yeah, of course”, she kisses my cheek.

“I’ll be out in a few seconds”, I force a smile on my face.

“Don’t take too long”, Lexa quickly presses another kiss on my cheek before leaving.

I close the door behind her. “Oh Kiddo”, I touch my stomach. “How do I tell her?”

********

“Oh Kiddo… how do I tell her?”

_ Kiddo? Tell me? _

I think back to last night… Clarke’s stomach was a little raised.

(last night)

“Call me rude but are you getting fat?”, I lightly tap Clarke’s stomach.

Clarke shakes her head. “Just preparing for winter”, Clarke smiles at me.

“It’s cute”, I kiss Clarke’s stomach.

(present moment)

I feel a million jolts of excitement run through me.

_ Is… is she pregnant? _

I turn around and run downstairs. I quickly set the table and sit down. Once lunch rolls by, I notice how quiet Clarke is.

“What’s wrong”, I watch Clarke pick at her food.

“Nothing… I just feel bad.”

“Does your stomach hurt?”

“No”, she looks at me. “It’s just… I made you miss your flight.”

I tap my chin a few times. “It’s fine, you didn’t do anything bad. I’d rather be here with you”, I smile at her.

Clarke forces a smile.

“But that’s not what’s bugging you.”

Clarke sighs. “Where are all your maids?”

“You’re changing the subject”, I glare at Clarke.

“I’m pregnant”, she blurts out the words.

“Really? Whose is it?”, I try to keep my cool. Meanwhile my hands are shaking so I have to cross my arms and hide my hands, in hopes she won’t notice.

“Whose do you think? You’re the only person that has put anything up me”, Clarke nervously glances at me.

_ Does she expect me to be mad? _

“Why don’t we decorate your room”, I brush away what Clarke just said.

She stares at me, her eyes showing sadness.

“We can do whatever colors you want”, I picture Clarke’s room.

********

I stare at Lexa, watching as she rambles about something. I notice her hands are shaking and her foot is tapping.

“You’re worried”, I reach out and take her hands. “Talk to me.”

“I’m fine”, Lexa forces a smile. “Anyways-”

“Please”, I squeeze her hand. “Don’t make me chase you.”

“I… I’m scared Clarke”, Lexa looks at me. “I-I don’t know how to parent.”

“No one knows how to parent”, I smile at her. “But we’ll figure it out… I promise.”

“Well then, let’s get to decorating. This baby needs a room.”

“You change the subject way too much”, I smile at her.

February 8th, 3032

“Watch this”, I whisper to the bean in my stomach. Reaching out, I smear paint on Lexa’s cheek.

“You sausage!”, Lexa smiles at me.

“Just adding more color to you”, I smile at her.

“If you weren’t pregnant, I would totally kill you”, she wraps her arms around me. 

The three of us fall to the floor, laughing.

“You’re getting big”, Lexa kisses my cheek then stomach. “Maybe this baby is gonna be chunky.”

“That’s not a bad thing”, I smile at Lexa.

“You two done cuddling?”

I look up to see Raven.

“I like how the place is coming together”, Luna looks around.

“But it’s missing something… every kid should grow up with a best friend”, Raven smiles.

I stand up. “Should’ve got me that dog”, I smirk at Lexa.

“Which do you prefer, yorkie or corgi-aussie mix?”

“Yorkies are cute but Corgi is the way to go”, I tap my foot. “I think.”

“Hmm… interesting choice”, Lexa smiles at me.

“Do you ever stop smiling”, I tilt my head.

Lexa forces a frown on her face.

“Nah, I like your smile”, I push her cheeks together. “My little muffin.”

Raven bursts out laughing.

“I told you not to call me that in front of my friends”, Lexa frowns, her eyes full of embarrassment.

I kiss her nose and look around the house.

_ I can’t wait for you to come, you’re gonna love life. _


	47. Chapter 47

**May 21st, 3036**

I stare at my ‘diary’. The page I wrote years ago has collected dust. A bunch of dust. Smiling I read the page.

“Not every love ‘story’ has a happy ending”, I laugh at the words I wrote down.

_I sounded like an emo._

“Macey!”, Madi squeals in the halls. “Get back here!”

Smiling I quickly write a few words down. 

**“Or so I thought”**

“Mommy! Mommy!”, Madi runs into my office, her smile as bright as the sun.

“Yes my little sunflower”, I lift her onto my lap.

“Nothing”, she settles into my lap. “I just wanted to be near you”, she touches my stomach. “And Aden.”

Smiling I stand up and leave my office.

“Oh hey pregnant lady”, Lexa smiles at me. Macey wiggles in her arms. “How’s my little man?”, she lightly touches my stomach.

“What are you making?”

“Your favorite”, Lexa sets Macey down. 

“When are you gonna tell me how to make it?”

“I’ve told you already… a lot of love.”

Madi giggles, her head now resting on my shoulder. “You’re silly Daddy.”

Note:

Honestly, this story should’ve been called the Ghost (a dead Costia manages to make the truth come out and bring a couple together all cause Costia wants her killer to confess and move on) or something. The subscription should’ve been can one ghost mend a broken heart and bring a couple together? I called it dear diary cause I wanted it to be written out like Clarke is writing in her diary about all this, which it kinda shows in the end but I guess you can also say that Costias’ letters were like a diary and she says “Dear reader” so you could take this more as a ghost/thriller/ love story like story. I don’t know.


End file.
